Episode 39 | November 22, 2016

The Ultra Spiritual Guru: Awaken with JP Sears


A Personal Note from Orion

It’s always good to inject a little humor into our lives, and JP Sears has literally taken this idea and has successfully spun it onto a whole other level. Perhaps you’ve seen a few of his “Awaken With JP” videos on YouTube, poking fun at everything from gluten-free to vegan lifestyles. His humor is a universal way of connecting with others, as its important to not take our selves too seriously and really be open in life.

The best part about the interview was just how much I learned from JP, on such a deeper level than I thought would be possible. He’s more than just a funny guy – he’s a very spiritual person, who tries to live his life unapologetically and as close to his true self as possible. His funny videos are simply a creative outlet to express his inner self, and to generate positive energy for him and for others.

 

 

In this Episode

  • [04:24] – JP starts things off by telling us a bit about himself.
  • [06:02] – The most spiritual experience JP has ever had is living his life unapologetically, he explains.
  • [08:52] – What does JP do to allow himself to be himself? In his answer, he reflects on Orion’s story as well as his own past.
  • [12:07] – When JP was growing up, he didn’t have specific role models. As a child, he looked up to various pro athletes. In hindsight, he liked “watching people express their greatness.” As an adult, his first real role model was Paul Chek of the C.H.E.K Institute.
  • [13:24] – JP explains what drew him to Paul.
  • [14:53] – We hear about JP’s perspective on what an “alpha male” is. He and Orion then discuss the difference between the traditional views of alpha males and the contemporary alpha male.
  • [17:25] – What’s the craziest thing JP has ever done? After some musing over the question, he concludes that saying yes feels like the craziest thing.
  • [19:54] – Orion takes a turn and shares the craziest things that she’s done. She and JP then discuss her experience in moving to Japan, and what profoundness she got from it.
  • [22:04] – JP responds to being asked whether he has any phobias by saying he has a phobia of having phobias. He then goes on to give a more serious answer.
  • [23:26] – Orion asks JP what he would take from his house if it were on fire and he only had time to grab three things. Coincidentally, it turned out he had to evacuate his house the day before. His answers are his dog Zephyr, his computer, and his video camera.
  • [24:53] – JP explores the concept of being attached to non-attachment. He also explains how this is how he balances making the types of videos he does with his own personal beliefs.
  • [26:67] – His ex-girlfriends are JP’s greatest teachers, he says. He then goes on to explore what he learned from his parents — and his dog.
  • [30:31] – After having heard from JP about his lessons from his dog Zephyr, Orion playfully discusses the three lessons that she has learned from her cat.
  • [32:18] – JP talks about sexual energy, describing it as “a river of life that flows through us.”
  • [35:38] – What are JP’s practices for increasing sexual energy? He clarifies that he still has a lot of work to do in overcoming old shame that he projects onto sexual energy.
  • [39:37] – Orion talks about Jaiya and sexual blueprints, which you can hear more about in Stellar Life Episode 3. She and JP then discuss dimming our light to let others shine, and how that relates to sexual energy.
  • [43:21] – What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
  • [44:30] – JP talks about what he gained from his experience with Tony Robbins.
  • [48:32] – We hear about Orion’s experiences with Tony Robbins — and she recommends his events as a place for single people to meet like-minded singles.
  • [50:10] – JP discusses how his friend Karen ended up becoming his assistant. His advice on hiring someone is to look for a feeling of trust.
  • [53:28] – What are JP’s three tips for living a stellar life? 1: Seek to be who you are, not who you want to be. 2: Be creative and express your creativity. 3: Practice vulnerability.

About Today’s Show

I would love to connect with you there and hear more about what you thought about the episode and what you learned, how you liked it and what inspired you about this conversation. And now, onto the show.

Hello and welcome to Stellar Life Podcast. I’m your host Orion. Today, I have with me JP Sears. I learned about JP just scrolling through my newsfeed on Facebook and watching this really, really funny video that made me laugh out loud. I got hooked and I started watching his videos. On YouTube, he portrays this ultra spiritual character who thinks he’s the most spiritual person on Earth but actually acts like an a-hole and is super selfish and self-centered. It’s really, really funny. JP creates those little comedies about veganism and anything spiritual like meditation, gluten-free, there are so many videos and they’re all really, really funny. I thought to myself wow, it’s going to be so interesting to actually talk to him. My first thought was oh, it’s going to be a really funny interview and we’re going to laugh out loud and that’s it. But actually, after I learned more about him and watched more videos, he’s an actual emotional healing coach and a very successful one and a very effective one. In real life, he’s super deep and interesting. This interview was so incredible because it was a combination of the two. Every once in awhile, he will crack a joke that is really, really funny. But then all of a sudden, we find ourselves going really deep into stuff like what is it being genuine and being yourself, what is it conquering fear. We even went all the way to sexuality and what is sexual energy. What is success? It was just a really good interview, so good that I actually listened to it about three or four times already. I really hope that you guys will enjoy it as much as I did. I really, really enjoyed talking to him. Before we go onto the show, I would love to invite you to review and subscribe to Stellar Life. You can go to my website, www.stellarlifepodcast.com. You can check out the show notes, I’m going to include some of his funny videos, a checklist and all kinds of good stuff in the show notes. Ladies, please join me on my Facebook group, www.facebook.com/groups/stellarlife. I would love to connect with you there. Now, oh my god, this is really exciting, onto the show.

‏‏Hello JP and welcome to the Stellar Life Show. How are you doing?

‏‏I’m dysfunctional as hell and I’m significantly happy about it. Thank you Orion for having me on your beautiful show.

‏‏Thank you so much. Let’s just start by you telling us a little bit about yourself.

‏‏Incredibly handsome. I mean gosh, charming blue eyes and just funny as heck. Did I mention handsome three times yet? I think only twice. I’m very handsome. I think we got three times on the handsome. Aside from that banter, that actually amused me, probably nobody else in the world. A little bit about me, I had an emotional healing client practice for the past 15 years. The past three years, I’ve been making YouTube videos. Two of those, most recent two of the last three years have been I’ve been also doing the Ultra Spiritual comedy series of videos. I do speaking, performing, and all of those nuances of my work, I think there’s more. However, the heart and soul of my work is helping people to help themselves. One of the dimensions of my work, a way that I hopefully help people to help themselves is speaking to people through the language of humor. It seems to be a universal language where messages can go in deeper than they otherwise could, some of the time if they’re spoken in a serious way. That’s a little bit about me. Man, my blue eyes are pretty groovy.

‏‏They are. They’re very, very, groovy.

‏‏It’s very humble of you to let me tell you that, Orion.

‏‏You’re the ultra spiritual person, what was the most spiritual experience you’ve ever had?

‏‏I think telling people that I’m significantly spiritual is about the most spiritual experience I’ve ever had. In addition to that possibility, what might be a little bit more of a sincere answer, I think living my life unapologetically, being myself to the best degree I can at any given moment, it’s never perfect, sometimes it’s terrible but doing the best to be the best I can be, not even the best in terms of better or worse. Being the most authentic me as possible and letting my creativity be expressed, letting my perspectives be expressed, letting my voice be expressed. And very importantly, noticing my internal environment, how I’m feeling and what my perspectives are, I need to notice that. Not apologizing for it, to me, it is very spiritual, it helps really honor my life and whatever it is that’s wanting to live through me. I think we become and I become disconnected from my spirit when I start to restrict myself or adopt the posture of apologizing for who I am and what naturally wants to come through me because it’s weird or whatever it is. I know that’s not any kind of grand, sitting under the tree and I became fully enlightened and there were sparkles in the sky but I think life is the most spiritual thing I can ever do. Of course as we all know, just because we’re alive doesn’t mean we are living life, we might be surviving it. A lot of our survival is oriented around avoiding our life. We try to live what we think other people’s expectations are of our life and avoid anything outside of that. I do think plain and simple, truly living truly our life is a significantly spiritual experience.

Just because we’re alive doesn’t mean we are living life, we might be surviving it. A lot of our survival is oriented around avoiding our life. Click To Tweet

‏‏I love what you are saying, how you’re allowing yourself to be yourself because that’s not an easy thing. I know when I came here, I came to New York to study acting. I lived in Japan and in Japan I used to dress differently, I used to dress with more colors and be more outgoing. I came here and I really wanted to fit in because I was different, I was from another place, I sounded different. I started to dress down, started to put myself in a box that became so small and so tight that I didn’t know how to become myself again, it was difficult to find who I am compared to other people. What do you do to allow yourself to be that quirky, funny, say it like it is type of guy?

‏‏I love hearing your experience because I think it really reflects to my experience and it sounds similar. You can let me know if I’m projecting too much onto you but it sounds like you moved to New York and you lost yourself, you became someone different out of the goofy but understandable desire to fit in. I think that was necessary for me. I did it the first 30, 32, 33 years of my life where I essentially lost myself. I want to say pain is the best motivator, it’s a motivator. Is it the best? I don’t know. It’s a powerful motivator. I think for me the pain of losing myself became great enough that it was now worth me expressing myself. I didn’t even know who am was. I don’t want to avoid being myself. I don’t want to be someone else. I don’t want to be anything other than me but I don’t know who I am, and that’s okay. I still don’t know who I am. I don’t even think who we are can be comprehended like know who you are. I think we can be who we are and not have any kind of logical comprehension of it and conceptualization of it. It’s sort of ironic because at least in my life, when I started to lose myself, I was doing that to avoid pain. Avoid the pain of feeling not accepted, rejected, disapproved of. If I was just being myself, I didn’t fit into the box of people around me. I was avoiding pain but of course there comes a time when continuing to avoid the original pain in our imagination, that pain becomes greater than the actual pain of stepping into who we are. It’s funny, I think the pain of stepping into who we are, that doesn’t really have much traction in my reality. It’s huge in my imagination. I imagined and I feared there would be so much pain being who I am but I find life is actually way more graceful. Yes it has challenges and blitz in the radar, but the pain I feared would be there with being myself and not apologizing for it, it was just that pain that I feared would be there. I think the wonderful writer, Mark Twain, I don’t think I ever read anything of his other than just his quotes but I love his quotes. One of his quotes is, “I’ve lived through thousands of traumatic experiences, it’s just most of them never happened.” I think the trauma and the pain of being ourselves is a trauma that we imagine will be there. I think very rarely are we actually inflicted with pain in just being ourselves. I think it’s a great liberation actually.

‏‏Yeah, the fear of fear itself.

‏‏Right on. Our imagination is a powerful thing, that’s for sure, and it can definitely work for us and there’s another side to that polarity too.

‏‏Who were your role models when you grew up?

‏‏That’s a great question. I didn’t have specific role models until I was like 20 years old. When I was younger, I looked up to whoever pro-athlete was the flavor of the month, whether it’s Michael Jordan or the Super Bowl winning quarterback at that year. There’s a lot of inspiration that when I look back in hindsight, I can use the words of watching people express their greatness. I think greatness is a little bit of a shallow sounding term but really watching other people become an open vessel to express the gifts that want to flow through them, that’s my adulthood interpretation of why my child self would really become fixated on various athletes along the way. When I was 20, my very first mentor and role model I think was a guy named Paul Chek, he runs a institute in San Diego.

‏‏I love him. He’s great.

‏‏I got connected with him and actually ended up teaching for his institute for seven years after I went through the training. Paul Chek was my first specific role model.

‏‏Wonderful. What did you like about him?

‏‏He was definitely radical. Here he was, for all intents and purposes, in a boring industry. Industry of exercise, nutrition, and health. Boring industry, very important, but at least to my 20-year old self’s eyes, boring. “Who cares about this?” But he was such a character. When he would talk about things that if I read about anywhere else or heard about anywhere else, it’s like, “Ah, I can’t even get into that.” He was a messenger carrying a message. The messenger himself, he was very entertaining to me and intriguing. He’s got a lot of charisma, he’s got a lot of alpha maleness, he’s got a very sensitive side. He’s lived life, everything from his childhood through his adult experiences, he’s really been to the far corners of the Earth in life experience. I think being able to experience him as a person was rather than just a teacher but knowing his life experiences and watching him get excited and hyped up and angry and happy, that was a big part of what intrigued me about him.

‏‏What is an alpha male for you and how do you show up as one?

‏‏I don’t really show up as one but what is an alpha male to me? To me, it’s kind of usually a guy, can be a woman, who expresses a lot of assertiveness and almost like lion, king of the jungle nest where there’s taking claim usually loudly like this is how it is or let me take charge. I don’t think that’s really a good thing or a bad thing, it’s just an expression some people have. I would say, I’m one of the least alpha male people that I know. That’s just never really been my cup of tea of expression.

‏‏I might disagree with you. I just think that there is the alpha that is older like the caveman type alpha and there’s the modern-day alpha. That’s different.

‏‏Tell me about the modern-day alpha.

‏‏Well, the modern-day alpha is actually a high achiever, is somebody who’s not afraid to put himself out there, it’s somebody who relates with his heart and generosity and somebody who treats people with respect, especially the women. I think that you are showing those traits and this is how you show up in the world.

‏‏I love your definition. It honestly feels like an upgrade of my definition which maybe one of the least alpha things I can say. I was wrong, you were right. In all honesty, it’s a beautiful upgraded definition to me, your definition represents a lot more balance within what’s called the masculine psychology. I think the alpha definition that I’ve had in my head for whatever reason, probably for too long, has been based mostly on the immature masculine psychology. That’s not to say Paul Chek, he’s immature, but of course he has that side, he’s a human being.

‏‏We all do.

‏‏Yeah, for sure. But nonetheless, everything you said about the definition, not only do I like that definition but it’s like, yeah, I identify with that. Maybe I do have some or a lot of modern-day alpha-ness.

‏‏Maybe you do.

‏‏Already, I’m rewriting a software of who I think I am because of my experience of you, Orion. You’re a powerful lady.

‏‏Oh, wonderful. Thank you so much. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

‏‏That’s a good question. There’s a lot of dangerous things I’ve done; some physical, some just risky in a psychological sense. When I was a kid, rollerblading down the steps of my parent’s house which didn’t turn out super well and I didn’t really understand Physics enough to let be determined. Then there’s irresponsible, crazy, being early 20s or late teens and drinking significantly too much to the point of really being in a bad way. What feels crazy to me, kind of a more present day life, we all do cliff jumping if that’s around, I was doing cliff jumping over New Years. But to me, what feels really crazy and adventurous in some sense is saying yes to things when opportunities come my way andsaying yes to things when they feel right even though they scare the hell out of me. I have no idea how I’ll deal with them, I have no idea if I can do them. On the surface to observers, it probably doesn’t look crazy, it probably looks like, “JP just said the word yes when he was asked a question,” but that feels all kinds of cliff jumping crazy inside of me. It’s really quite thrilling and it’s really quite fulfilling as well. It helps me keep stepping in more and more to myself and I think my gifts as well. I do think we have to get crazy in order to find our sanity. Getting crazy in the sense of if something feels right to me in my heart even though it scares the hell out of me, I’m going to say yes to it. Parts of me wish I didn’t do that and other parts of me are grateful as hell that I can get crazy enough. The word crazy to me represents I’m challenging my beliefs about who I am and what my world is. When I’m able to step outside of that and explore the mystery of the world in my self that doesn’t fit my neurospectrum box and definition and interpretation, to me, that’s what real crazy is and I think that’s awesome.

‏‏Yeah, I agree completely. The craziest things that I did athletically was the Tough Mudder. I love that experience and I think the craziest thing that I’ve done is going to Japan when I was 22. It was my first trip out of the country and I had $700 in my pocket and I didn’t know anybody there.

‏‏I bet that gets the butterflies going. That does sound pretty crazy.

‏‏I went for three and a half weeks and I stayed for three and a half years so that was kind of crazy.

‏‏Wow.

‏‏Everybody told me that it was a bad idea. I did what my gut told me to do and it was probably one of the most profound things I’ve ever done for myself in my life.

‏‏The fact that you were there for three and a half years sounds like it would imply that, and the fact that it’s profound. You would’ve missed out on the profoundness if you weren’t willing to get crazy. I love that life lesson, sister. Can I ask, I think the word profound to me really implies my next question. How can that possibly be spoken to with a few words? But nonetheless, I want to ask anyway, what profoundness did you get from it? How was it profound for you?

‏‏Profound is one of those words that can have so many words stuck into it. It’s one of those beautiful words. It was profound in a way of discovering courage, self-discovery, opening my horizon, different way of living, different culture, training my brain in a different way because I studied the language, I found love. I was with a person that showed me a lot of things that I wasn’t aware of and showed me the world. I felt like I was a completely different person after that experience. It will always have some space in my heart, I love that place.

‏‏Yeah, it’s beautiful to hear. Thank you for putting into a few words a little soil sample of the profoundness.

‏‏Thank you. That was a scary thing for me. Do you have any phobias?

‏‏I’m phobic of having phobias. That makes me confused and conflicted. Nothing that I would call really phobias. I have a bit of a fear of heights. I think in part it’s healthy because I have self-reservation. You could get hurt falling. My fear of heights I think is a little bit more intense than just that. I can still get on the ladder and do something when I need to but I definitely don’t like it. Aside from that, no other phobias that I’m aware of. In fact, I might have so many but they’re just so intense that they’re numbed out. Let me know if you pick up any telepathic signals of my repressed phobias.

‏‏My sense of you is that you conquered a lot of your fears and this is just a part of your path which is to go forward and tackle fears, you don’t run away from your fears.

‏‏I think I can surf that slope.

‏‏I love that expression, surf that slope.

‏‏I’ll let you use it and you only have to pay me a little bit in royalties.

‏‏Thank you for that. If your house was on fire and you could only grab three things before leaving, what would it be?

‏‏That’s actually a really interesting question because yesterday I had to evacuate my house.

‏‏You did?

‏‏I live in Charleston South Carolina where there’s basically a hurricane on steroids coming. A million people in the area were evacuated. Yesterday, I actually did a 14-hour drive to my parents’ house, they live in Ohio. Anyway, this is where I came to fly out your way to LA next week. I will say this because a part of me thinks I’m in charge of the universe, hopefully the hurricane does a fly by and doesn’t really hit direct on. But nonetheless, my thinking before I left my house was worst case scenario. What are the essentials for me to take if everything is lost and of course I can’t take anything more than what will fit in my car. My dog of course, he’s number one, my computer and then my video camera.

‏‏Wow.

‏‏My dog, my computer, and my video camera. I love my house, it’s a nice house and I certainly have other possessions but I can deal with watching them all go.

‏‏Are you like a buddhist where you don’t have attachments to your things?

‏‏I definitely like to say I’m buddhist because I’m very attached to my idea of non-attachment. Everybody should be non-attached. That’s a lot of attachment there in a very non-attached kind of way. I’m maybe a little bit buddhist. I do enjoy a lot of buddhist philosophy and some of it I do my best to integrate into my life. I don’t pretend to be perfect with it but the idea of non-attachment for me is helpful. It doesn’t mean I’m not attached, it means I aim for it. Thinking about if a lot of my possessions got wiped out, I think I would be challenged by it yet I think in a way peacefully challenged by it. I think to me, non-attachment, the most important place that I like to apply that in my life is to my beliefs and my thinking. That’s a lot of my comedy videos, they’re a therapeutic practice for me to become non-attached to my beliefs and my own dogmas. Anything I do, comedy videos, it’s important stuff to me. I don’t want to come from a place of disrespect and condescension, that’s why I won’t do videos on things that aren’t somehow related to my life. I do videos on things that are important to me but if I can have a playful attitude about those important things, then to me that playfulness is the energy of non-attachment. I can do a video doing a parody on meditation. Meditation’s important to me but if I can have that belief and just not believe that belief as much, not take it as seriously, then I think I’m becoming less attached to my own beliefs, my own thinking, and therefore hopefully less trapped in my mind, less trapped in kind of interpreting life from a place of who I’m not rather than maybe who I actually am. I don’t think I am my thinking, I am my beliefs.

‏‏Who are your greatest teachers?

‏‏I would say the whole line up of ex-girlfriends, I have been blessed. I think it’s funny too, when we’re talking about romantic partners, in the new age community, we all learn pretty quick to consider our next partners. They’re my greatest teacher. In a way, I think saying, “Oh, they’re my greatest teacher,” is a way of saying, “I still resent the hell out of them.” That might be true, the resentment for some of them yet I do feel there is the greatest teacher component there. My most recent partner, her and I broke up probably 10 months ago, Diana, there’s so much that she taught me in our relationship. I by no means comprehended it all. I’m still absorbing and processing and making sense of things. Also, that friend, hopefully not in a passive aggressive way but I would say my parents have been great teachers for me. I do think the great teachers are typically teaching us when we don’t know we’re learning and they don’t know they’re teaching. I’m not here to say my parents sat down with the scrolls and taught me, “JP, here’s how to have a beautiful, fulfilling life.” There’s some things that I took away that were like, “Oh, that’s a gem. Mom and dad, thank you for that.” Then there’s a lot that I took away about learning how not to live life and experiencing my life experiences with my parents. They are great teachers for me. Also, I say this not just because he’s listening but I think my dog is a great, great teacher for me. I think there’s a reason that dog is God spelled forward. I think my little Zephyr teaches me a lot. He teaches it all in a language that’s too powerful to put into English words. He does amazing things for me. He helps ground me, he helps teach me and remind me what’s most real. In fact, I recently wrote about what Zephyr’s been teaching me, a little contribution for a book that sounds true I’ll be putting out called The Dharma of Dogs. I think it’ll be due out maybe in the middle of 2017. Not meant to be a shameless plug for that but just to say it was a real pleasure to give myself the gift of sitting down and writing about what has Zephyr taught me. I actually wrote it from Zephyr’s perspective. I wrote it from the perspective of what I was trying to teach JP, from Zephyr’s perspective.

‏‏Wow, I’d love to read it now. What about The Dharma of Cats? I have a cat.

‏‏Dharma of cats, I don’t think I’m enlightened enough to learn much from cats. They seem so stoic. It’s like how can I get any lessons from that when you avoid me or you act pretentious? I love all animals but I will say it’s easier for me to connect with and learn from a dog. Right now, I don’t have a cat, I grew up with cats. I’m wondering, Orion, are you enlightened enough to learn from your cat?

‏‏Somewhat. Not yet there, but I think some of the lessons I learned from my cat is, one, if you ask for something loudly enough and enough times, you’ll probably get it.

‏‏As we relate to the universe, that’s a great lesson from a cat.

‏‏Two is boundaries. If you don’t like something, bite. Three is sleep is good.

‏‏I like that.

‏‏She’s also very sweet. I think cats are healers in disguise because if you feel low or bad, she will lay on me and purr. I think it was scientifically proven that the purring of a cat which are on a different vibrations, very soothing.

‏‏I heard something along those lines. My experience has me where I definitely believe that. It is very beautiful to listen to a cat purr, absolutely. Thank you for sharing those lessons. It also makes me think the lesson that cats teach and dogs teach kind of the doctrine of licking thyself is probably to be taken symbolically rather than literally or not but maybe.

‏‏Yeah, that’s so cute. I want to go back to your ex-girlfriend and go more into relationships.

‏‏Yeah, what the hell was wrong with her, Orion? Let’s talk about that.

‏‏No, no, not about that. I want to talk about sexual energy. I know you have a video about that. What is sexual energy for you and how do you transcend sexual energy to real life?

‏‏Wow. I love that big, bold, beautiful question. My delusional thought, what’s sexual energy? To me, sexual energy, this might sound abstract probably because it is, let’s see if I can get more grounded with it. To me, sexual energy is a ritual of life that flows through us. We can try to restrict it, repress it, suppress it, and not control it. I think that costs us. This river of sexual energy, I think when we can honor it and not control it in the sense of repressing it but also not control it in the sense of let me use this to gratify myself, increase my status and control other people. I think that is very disrespectful of a very sacred energy, the river of life of sexual energy that flows through us. To me, there’s that and that certainly goes into a very literal physiological level where our hormonal system and our physiology, our tissues, our nervous system is very, very much a part of this. I do think those physical systems are a slave to the more subtle levels of our being. Nonetheless, there’s a lot going on with sexual energy. In any way, I think sexual energy is allowing that river of life to flow through our psychology or physiology and find expression in some times that of course takes on the dance of being sexual with another person and sometimes not. I think creativity can have a lot of influence from our sexual energy when we can uncap it. I think that’s so much easier said than done. I will say this, I think sexual energy, maybe this is getting into the transcending part or part of me want to use the word integrating rather than transcending. I think sexual energy leads us into a mystery. I think where real life is is  always the mystery. I think when we take a look at the known, the familiar. That’s kind of the life that we’ve already lived that’s why it’s familiar to us, that’s why we know about it, we’ve lived that, we just remember it. I think sexual energy takes us into a mystery. It can be a mystery of intimacy. I think it can be a mystery of creative expression and mystery of union with someone else where here’s these two apparent parts that create a third thing called a whole which is the sum of the parts that can’t happen unless there’s a merging together. I think just like anything else in nature, it’s the sexual energy that creates the opening for a merging to come together so something greater than ourselves can be created. I’ve lost sight of the question.

Sexual energy is a ritual of life that flows through us. We can try to restrict it, repress it, suppress it, and not control it. Click To Tweet

‏‏How do you ignite your own sexual energy? What do you do? What’s your practice? Because I know there are a lot of practices for women, but what are the men practices to increasing sexual energy?

‏‏Well, here’s my answer and I don’t know if it’s a functional answer of a dysfunctional answer. First off, I would say to be honest, I don’t want to mislead people, I think I have a lot of work to do at better accepting my sexual energy and essentially being in a more functional relationship with it where I can honor and not get constricted or squeamish around what’s old shame that I project onto sexual energy.

‏‏Wow.

‏‏Here’s my answer. I don’t do anything active as a way of igniting my sexual energy. When I feel my sexual energy, whether it’s arousal or something even deeper than that that I don’t really have a word for, I do my best to honor it. It can be as simple as allowing myself to flirt with a woman. I used for so long, I would carry so much shame about it’s disrespectful to flirt with a woman. It’s just a rationalization that my shame would essentially express in order to justify shutting down my sexual energy but I’m learning to outgrow that word. If I’m in a setting and there’s a lovely lady there and there appears to be some kind of chemistry, maybe we’re not going to be life partners or maybe it’s going to be nothing other than this conversation, but being able to engage more dimensions of myself through this thing that we so trivially call flirting, I think there’s a connection that happens that you psychologically, emotional, mental, spiritual levels when we allow ourselves to flirt with someone. To me, that’s really important to say yes to. When I feel that I do my best to notice and let it express rather than clamping it down because I’ve spent too many years clamping it down. I will also say this, here’s the footnote when I mentioned why I don’t do anything active. I’m just kind of passively trying to say yes when I feel the natural lava wanting to come up. Maybe I do do something active. The past, I don’t know, maybe two years or especially the past year, I’m devoting more and more surface area in the landscape of my life and my schedule for creativity. In my opinion, creativity doesn’t come from a human mind, it comes from connecting to something greater than ourselves and allowing that to come through us. While that isn’t physically arousing to me, I do think there’s a very kind of sexual energy connection and flow that comes with creativity. Nonetheless, that is maybe some kind of active practice I have. I appreciate the awesome question on this.

‏‏I think sexual discovery is a part of self discovery. It’s one of the same, it’s a topic that people are shy from both men and women. I like what you said about flirting. Flirting is such a great thing. It’s a lovely exchange of energy of I acknowledge you, I see you, do you want to play with me? It might be a yes or no but it brings out such a lovely, sweet, warm, and bubbly sexual energy. Not even sexual energy, just energy in general and connection like you said. It’s really nice. Have you ever done the practice tantra?

‏‏I have not. I’m curious about it but no, I’ve never gone into it. How about yourself?

‏‏I have a little bit and I definitely want to learn more, it’s very pleasurable. There are a few sexual blueprints I studied with Jaya who is a sexologist. She talks about five sexual blueprints. One is the sexual, the sensual, the energetic, the kinky, and the shape-shifter. I have a whole episode about it, it’s episode number three I think with Jaya. Studying with her, I also learned a little bit about tantra and the energetic part of my sexual blueprints and it’s fascinating. It’s just great. It brings out a deeper connection.

‏‏I ‘d love to check out that episode you did with Jaya. I’m also inspired watching how you light up talking about some of the tantra you’ve been into and how it’s pleasurable for you.

‏‏That was part of me putting myself in the box which was hiding that part of me as well, pretty much hiding everything that I was because I was afraid to get judged. I dimmed my own light because I thought that will help other people shine or help other people see me. It’s just absolute bullshit. Sorry.

‏‏Yeah, it does sound like bullshit and I think it’s bullshit that I know I can relate to. I think tons of other people can relate to their version of how do we dim ourselves with the fantasy based illusion that we can actually help other people shine more by dimming a part of ourselves, rejecting a part of ourselves that we believe somehow is going to be a burden on other people, in this case, an element of it is sexual energy. It’s interesting. Bottom line is we are sexual beings, like it or not, as is anything else that’s alive. Learning more and more how to say yes to it I think is so important. I think one of the talk about my shame, I’ll call it rationalizations to deny my sexual energy. That part of me is used for so long. I would take a lot of people who in my opinion were acting out creepy, sexual, predatorily sexual tendencies and be like, “I don’t want to be that.” Therefore sexual energy for me or I least know more other than basic expressions that are kind of one dimensional and get pretty boring. Of course, I think it’s great. I am grateful, I’m repulsed when I see people act out either active or passive or passive-aggressive sexual tendencies using sexual energy in a way that is not integrous in my opinion. Grateful I can be repulsed by that but learning how to separate, there’s that and there is beautiful, respectful, honoring, intimate, sexual expression that’s beyond my wildest imagination, that is there too. It’s not just these two things are merged together, no, they’re separate.

‏‏Yeah, I love it. I love that you make that separation and it’s such a good distinction, it’s like looking at a wealthy person who is treating other people with disrespect and saying, “All wealthy people are really bad, therefore money is bad, therefore I want to shy away from my success.”

‏‏That’s exactly it, absolutely.

‏‏What is the difference between being alive and truly living?

‏‏In my opinion, truly living is boldly stepping into our self and not apologizing for it versus being technically alive, surviving, I think that’s when we are living someone else’s life instead of our own. We may be very unconsciously in a poster of being a slave to expectations that we experience other people to have of us, parents, society, whoever it is. Truly being alive is I think us being willing to explore the mystery of we are and saying yes to expressing it and not apologizing for it.

‏‏Love it.

‏‏To me, that is truly life. I think real life happens when we’re exploring mystery, not being in our comfort zone of the familiar.

Real life happens when we’re exploring mystery, not being in our comfort zone of the familiar.

‏‏You studied with great leaders and luminaries and I recently saw a video about Tony Robbins and that was hilarious. I love Tony. I’ve followed Tony for years, I did all his programs. What did you gain out of that experience with Tony?

‏‏A significant amount. I was blown away by my experience there. If you haven’t seen the video, I’ve got a video called The Tony Robbins Experience. Some of the b-roll video footage of that video was me in character at the event with the crowd. Aside from that, maybe an hour or so when I was dressed up and acting kind of goofy, actually his team was filming me, we collaborated on the project. Aside from those times, I was fully immersed in the experience. I was there going full in to participate. That was about three months ago at this point and I’ve experienced, and I don’t use this term lightly, a significant shift inside of me, a level of passion and energy that’s with me on a daily basis and I’m still using some of the practices that he taught in order to essentially keep those passion and inspiration receptors active. I think they truly are receptors in very actively changing my state rather than kind of sitting back passively for most of the day saying, “Man, I hope I’m in a good mood and energized today.” Becoming much more of ac active participant of feeling good and being in a peak state and having the energy and passion to better give my mission or to better serve my mission. Specifically, there were two things that I was, during one point, during one of the introspective exercises kind of like, “What are two things that you know you need to do but you’re not doing them, you know you’re blocked on them and being blocked on them is really impairing your life or holding you back from something?” There were two things. I wrote them down and they were one of the things I’ve been delaying for a few years which was hiring an assistant. I mean at this time, middle of the summer, I was not sleeping much, not even having much time for creativity because I was just trying to handle everything in my business myself.

‏‏Wow.

‏‏It’s just completely killing me but the upside to my dysfunctional ego is, “I’m in control of everything. Even if this kills me, at least I’m in control.” But a wiser part of me knew, “I need to surrender control. I need to hire someone.” The other thing is there had been, over the past year and a half or so, there’s been various TV production companies that have approached me wanting to do a show together based on my ultra spiritual character. Some of them were just not a good fit but there had been a company that we started talks maybe late spring and they felt like a good fit. I wasn’t getting crazy in saying yes to it, it’s like oooh that cliff jump, that’s big enough. In my heart, I knew that felt like a good fit and in my heart I knew I needed to hire someone. I wrote those down during the exercise and I think what the other self supportive strategies that he taught, I went home and I think within a week I had a TV agreement signed and I had someone hired. Since then I had brought another manager and agents into my business as well. That’s a very tangible shift, that’s a made a huge, huge, difference not only to what I call my business, my brand, what I do. It’s now able to keep growing at a faster and faster rate. My personal satisfaction, how liberated I feel inside of my own skin and how much passion I feel about my life and my mission on a daily basis which are sort of super intangible yet I can feel them, that’s just been dramatically improving since Tony’s event. Anyway, you got me excited.

‏‏Yeah, I’m excited too because Tony had an incredible impact on my life. It helped me at a time where I was very depressed actually and looking for answers. That helped created a shift and his other event, Date With Destiny I actually met my fiancé.

‏‏Oh, right on.

‏‏Yeah, it was a big, big, breakthrough. Big shift.

‏‏You definitely found your destiny at his event.

‏‏Yeah.

‏‏That is amazing. I have so much respect for Tony.

‏‏It’s actually a great place for single people to find really quality people. Just saying.

‏‏I bet that’s true. Actually, I definitely imagine that’s true. I was so surprised in the best possible way in person not only meeting Tony but also just experiencing his event, how deep of a person he is. I was very privileged to be able to meet him in person. I think there’s magic inside of all of us. I would never discount anybody including myself or you. I would just say Tony is very magical as well and he’s very good at expressing his magic. He truly has a gift to people who are willing to be touched by it.

‏‏Amen. Beautiful. I had the pleasure of connecting with your assistant Karen. She’s a lovely person. I can sense it through the emails. How did you find her? How did you find a good person? I find this to be a challenge, to find somebody who resonates with you and is really committed to working with you and committed to your mission.

‏‏Karen has been a great friend and feels like a family member for about 10 years. I met her when I was living in San Diego. It was actually within a week, maybe even sooner than that after I finished with Tony’s Unleash the Power Within Event, I just said, “Yep, it’s very clear to me. Not only do I have to, but I need to, want to and I’m being guided to hire an assistant.” Karen has become much more than an assistant. I was just on the phone with her letting her know we’re catching up, here’s what’s on my mind. Man, it’s killing me trying to do everything on my own. We had a whole conversation, I told her I’m definitely going to be hiring someone. I don’t know who, I don’t even know how to hire someone, but that’s not going to stop me so I’ve got to figure out how and who. Probably five minutes after we hung up the phone, she called me back and said JP, I want you to consider me for the job. I’m like, “Oh, wow. That is amazing.” She’s a retired career military so she doesn’t need the job and she’s got the lifestyle where if it’s a job she wants, she’s got the time to do it. Being former career military, she’s incredibly structured and able to just get stuff done and take care of tons of stuff. Most of all, I trust her. I really trust her. She knows me, she knows all the dimensions of my work maybe better than anybody else on planet Earth. If I were giving somebody advice on hiring someone, to me, it would be trust is most important. I realize we’re not all going to have in our life a close friend we’ve known for the past 10 years. Nonetheless, if you’re interviewing someone and you hear all the facts, figures, logical information, notice the feeling of trust that you have or don’t have. Before I hired her, I was talking to lots of friends of mine who have the life experience, the wisdom of doing what I want do which is hiring the right people. The consistent pattern they were all telling me as I was asking them for their advice and wisdom is go for trust. You are way better off paying a lot more for someone who you trust compared to someone who you don’t trust. Especially for me, I’m not running a shoe store or just some online business selling whatever it is. What I do in my business is share my heart with people and I don’t take that lightly. It’s not just someone to do some kind of mindless task, it’s truly helping represent my heart. That trust has been incredibly important for that.

You are way better off paying a lot more for someone who you trust compared to someone who you don’t trust. Click To Tweet

‏‏I love it. I want to be respectful of your time, I can speak with you forever and ever and ever, you’re fascinating and you’re kind, and you’re sweet, and you’re smart, I just really enjoy this. Thank you so much.

‏‏You’re welcome.

‏‏But before we go, two questions. One is, what are your three tips to living a stellar life and two, where can people find you?

‏‏Finding me is obviously tip number one for a stellar life. Three steps for living a stellar life, number one that comes to my mind is seek to be who you are, not who you want to be, not who you think you are, but seek for the sacred space in between of who you are. Tip number two for a stellar life is be creative. I think expressing creativity is essential to us. It’s just like if you took a breath in and never exhaled it, it will kill you. I think never exhaling the creative inspiration that comes through us, maybe our , I don’t know. We’ve got to exhale our creativity. There’s a reason why we’re on this planet and I think one of the reason is for our own adventure and another reason is we realize I’m on this planet with 7 billion other people, I’m supposed to contribute too. Not only supposed to but I have this opportunity to contribute and creativity is part of how we do that. I’m not just talking about creativity in the sense of painting, music, though those are wonderful forms. Video and writing and speaking and performing are few of my creative expressions. For a person who says I’m not creative. I just want you to know I don’t buy it, I don’t buy that limiting story. I can understand the part of you that thinks that you’re not creative, I thought that too for the first 33 years of my life. If you pretend for a second you are absolutely a creative being, then the question isn’t am I creative or not, it’s how can I express my creativity? Not even what is going to be my main modus operandi of creative expression for the rest of my life but what is a way I can start experimenting with it. The first step to creativity is getting creative on how to express your creativity. The third invitation I’d invite people to consider for living a stellar life is practice vulnerability like it’s going out of style. I think creativity is part of the passionate expression of life and being vulnerable is the compassionate expression, vulnerability is getting more and more and more connected to ourself. Not our thinking, but to our self through this language called feeling. Carl said our feelings are the language of our soul so the more we can connect to our feelings, our hearts, our emotions, our sensations through this thing called vulnerability, the more I think we are stepping deeper into this miracle called our life. I think that also then has a beautiful secondary effect of making us more able to connect to other people which is a miracle itself. Those are a few thoughts of mine that are important to me, doesn’t mean they’re important to other people but I love them.

‏‏Where can people find you?

‏‏That second question I’d already forgotten. All my social media handles are AwakenWithJP. Facebook and YouTube are probably the top to hit me up but I’m on all of them, AwakenWithJP.

‏‏JP, I love and appreciate you. I thank you very much for your time and the beautiful words you shared with us today.

‏‏You’re welcome, Orion. Thank you for having me on and I judge you to be absolutely beautiful and delightful, so good to talk with you.

‏‏Yeah, you too. Thank you.

‏‏You’re welcome. Talk to you soon.

‏‏Bye.

‏‏Bye.

Your Checklist of Actions to Take

✓ How would your life be different if you lived it unapologetically? Envision what that life would look like, and then work on growing toward it.

✓ Eventually the pain of hiding who we are outweighs the pain of stepping into who we are. If you’ve reached this point, it’s time to be brave; release the persona you’ve created and become yourself.

✓ Practice differentiating between anticipated or imagined pain and potential real pain, and make choices based on the latter. Often the reality isn’t nearly as bad as our fear of it.

✓ For one month, commit to saying yes when something feels right to your heart or your gut, even when doing so is incredibly scary.

✓ We often think of non-attachment in terms of belongings. Try applying the same concept to your beliefs; work on becoming non-attached to your opinions and dogmas.

✓ Exes can be some of our greatest teachers. Think over your past relationships, and write down three things you learned from each.

✓ Honor your own sexual energy. If you carry shame surrounding it, work on releasing that shame so that you can accept and express your sexual energy instead of clamping it down.

✓ Make more space in your life for creativity. If you don’t yet have a creative outlet, start by getting creative in figuring one out!

✓ So many of us dim ourselves in a misguided attempt to let other people shine more brightly. Identify several examples of this in your life, and then make the choice to shine.

✓ What are two things that you know you need to do, but aren’t doing because you’re somehow blocked on them? Write them down, then put energy into doing or accomplishing them.

Links and Resources:

About JP Sears

Long before JP was making funny videos, his schedule was filled with sincerely helping people. JP actually has 16 years of experience as an emotional healing coach working with thousands of one-on-one clients. He’s also taught health, healing, and empowerment classes, workshops, and retreats around the world since 2006.

 

Facebook Comments