Rob Dionne

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O: Hello and welcome to Stellar Life Podcast. You know what it’s like, sometimes life happens. You have this amazing great habit and then life happens and then you fall off the wagon, that’s what happened to me with my fitness and my nutrition because about seven, eight months ago, I took my husband to Israel and we went to the Dead Sea, a beautiful resort. I went into the dry sauna. Apparently there were a bunch of women there before me and they entered the sauna wet and the water of the Dead Sea are a bit oily. As soon as I stood up in the dry sauna, I fell on my shoulder, on my wrist, I broke my wrist, it was so painful, I had to wear a cast. Man, that was not a great ending for our vacation. Since then, my fitness level is not the same as it used to be. I went back to the gym to train but it’s almost like I lost the fire, the motivation that I had before. I also don’t go as often as I used to and my nutrition is not as good as it used to. Also, my life became so busy with expanding my business and doing so many things, fitness was put aside. I invited an incredible fitness expert, his name is Rob Dionne. He’s a certified personal trainer and a nutrition expert. He hosts the podcast Open Sky Fitness Podcast with his wife Devon. This is also the name of their business, Open Sky Fitness. Rob has been featured in Men’s Health and on Wellness Force Radio. Now at 40, he’s in the best shape of his life. Listen to what he’s gotta tell you and what he’s gotta teach you. I hope you will get inspired to get back into perfect health, perfect fitness and take care of your nutrition as well. Now, without further ado, unto the show. Hey Rob, welcome to Stellar Life Podcast.

R: Thank you so much. I’m excited to be here.

O: I’m excited to have you. Before we start, why don’t you share with our listeners a little bit about yourself?

R: I am the host of the Open Sky Fitness podcast or I should say co-host because my wife and I host it together. We’ve been doing that for about four years now. I’m also a personal trainer here in Los Angeles and I also coach people how to be healthier in their lifestyles online as well. I focus a lot lately on entrepreneurs. That’s something that we’re gonna talk about today, is how entrepreneurs can be healthy within the confines of the craziness that they call their own personal world. That’s what I do in a nutshell. There’s all kinds of little things as well in there that my wife and I do because we work one on one with clients. We also live in Los Angeles and we do Airbnb stuff and we invest in real estate but it all falls into the category of being an entrepreneur. How does an entrepreneur do all that shit-oh, I’m sorry, I don’t know if I can curse on your show. Do all that stuff, but not necessarily lose their health in the process?

O: Shame on you, Rob, shame on you for saying that on my show. Terrible, terrible. No, it’s okay. I had some sexologists on this show and they said a few words that weren’t that proper. Who cares? It’s so weird because we all pretend to be so proper and then when we talk with our friends or at home, we’re not that proper. Why?

R: I don’t know. I’m very loosey-goosey with my words as well, I do curse on my podcast. My podcast is explicit. It’s funny, I had it last year, maybe a year and a half ago, I had somebody send me an email and he was very respectful, they were like, “I really enjoy your podcast, I love all the information you have. You and your wife are very funny but I don’t think that cursing helps your show. I think that it would be better if you didn’t curse.” I was like, “Interesting.” I went to my community on Facebook and I said, “What do you guys think of the cursing? I just got my first comment or critique that’s saying the cursing is too much.” My whole audience was just…

O: “We love when you curse.”

R: Because it’s so real. That’s basically what they said. It’s true, we pretend to be perfect on our shows.

O: I don’t pretend, Rob, I don’t pretend. I am.

R: That’s what started off your last episode where you talk about we all pretend to be perfect. Did you see the new documentary with Jim Carrey called Jim & Andy, it’s on Netflix. It’s all about Jim Carrey playing the role of Andy Kaufman when he was playing Man on the Moon. Jim Carrey had allowed epiphanies during the making of this movie because he played the character without ever breaking character. He was Andy Kaufman the whole time even when the cameras were not rolling which is bananas. They filmed in the whole process and Universal Studios, I think it was Universal or Paramount, whoever shot the movie, wouldn’t let that footage out until literally last year, this documentary, because they thought it was gonna make Jim Carrey look like an asshole and it was gonna basically tarnish his reputation and the studio’s reputation. They didn’t let it go but Jim Carrey just recently, and I guess the producers of this, released this. He had a whole bunch of epiphanies throughout the process. One of the things he realized was that everyone is broken. Once you realize this, that nobody is perfect and everyone’s broken in some way, once you realize that, everything gets easier because we put all these people on a pedestal, especially in the fitness world where we look at people and we see a six pack, we’re like, “That guy has got everything he could possibly want.” We see this woman whose got the perfect bikini body and we’re like, “She can’t possibly do anything wrong in her life, everything has to be going her way.” That’s just not the way things work. We do a really bad job in social media, not necessarily us but people out there do this disservice to the community where they pretend like everything is amazing. That just sets a whole bunch of people up for failure because they think they have to be perfect just like that person that they look up to on Instagram or on Facebook or wherever.

O: On your social media, do you post stuff that are very open and vulnerable? Do you post, “I had a bad day.”

R: I have the Open Sky Fitness Podcast community, that’s where my listeners go. If you’re listening to the show right now and you want to be a part of a further conversation like this, totally. It’s a close group, it’s my community. It’s the people that listen to my show and that are really, I don’t wanna say struggling with their health and their wellness but they’re on a path and they’re willing to be vulnerable.

O: They’re looking for guidance and they’re open. When people are ready, willing, and able and they find the right match or right coach or right guru, magic can happen.

R: That’s right. I did a Facebook live in there last week. I was just really open about what I’m struggling with within the community, what I struggle with, not knowing what they want and then how that influences me and how I feel somewhat inadequate to them. I’m being open.

O: What was the title of this video?

R: It’s just a Facebook Live.

O: You didn’t title it. I don’t know what you want from me. I have my own Awaken Your Inner Goddess Seven Day Challenge group, it’s a group I took and I did seven day challenge with them, I’m gonna relaunch the challenge soon. In the beginning, it was all around the challenge. I still have to feed the group and give them what they want but I’m at a place where, just the way you were open and vulnerable, “I don’t know if what I’m giving you is what you need.” I’ve never thought about doing a video like that, that’s awesome.

R: It’s interesting. I’ll tell you what came out of it. I’m scrolling through to see where the video is, if the live is coming on my normal videos. Let me see if I labelled it. You know what, I didn’t title it. I wrote in, because I was trying to figure out how their week was going for them and at the end of the week some interesting wins and kicks in the nuts, I called it on my own. I have a mastermind group, the first five minutes of it, we each have a minute or so to talk about our wins and our kicks in the nuts. Basically, what’s going well for you this week and what’s not going well?

O: What if it’s a girl? How could she talk about that?

R: You can still get kicked in the nuts.

O: No, I do not have nuts.

R: I think it’s not quite literal. What’s not going well for you is the way to say it. I don’t know, what would women say?

O: I’m just giving you a hard time.

R: I know you are, what would you say? What would you call it?

O: Just a kick in the mmm.

R: A kick in the blank. You get a kick in the blank, what’s your kick in the blank for the week? This is us being honest with what we’re struggling with. Again, there are some transparency there. I came up to the group and I said, “Hey guys, what are you looking for?” I have 30 something comments in there that happened in my group. It’s not a huge community, the video only has 137 views. Out of the 137, there’s 30 something comments that happen.

O: It doesn’t matter how big is the audience, it’s how involved and engaged is the audience. That’s the most important thing.

R: Exactly. You have to be present in there. I was like, “I’ve been doing my podcast for four years, not that I’ve exhausted every possibility but what do you guys want from my show? What are you looking for? Who would you like me interview?”

O: They probably would like you to interview Orion, she is so great. I’m telling you, she’s gonna rock their world.

R: For sure. I think your name came up a bunch of times, I think that was probably at least 20 out of the 30 something. Some of the things that came up was, people were like, “We’d love more podcasts about specifically weight training. What are some workouts that we can put together?” Through brainstorming, within that one conversation, we came up with what if once a month, every first week of every month, I brought on a local personal trainer that lives in Los Angeles, not just anybody but somebody who’s pretty well-known in the business and has a really high end clientele and have them come on and talk about what their process is, how they build workout programs, how do they work with their clients, how do they get the best results for their clients. These are not people who work online, they’re not people who sell all these different workouts. Let me pick their brain for you and find out what are some of the best techniques that they have and then it becomes an endless thing. That’s something that I’m putting together. I’ve been reaching out to personal trainers in Los Angeles. I didn’t think of this idea, they thought of this and we brainstormed to come up with this great possible content creation for the community. It’s something that I’m interested in.

O: What made you become a personal trainer?

R: I always like working out, I was always athletic as a kid growing up. I started lifting weights when I was I think 14 years old. I had a basement in my house, I built a gym down there with punching bags and weight lifting. I had four older sisters, I had zero brothers and zero masculine representation in terms of helping me shape that part of my life. My dad, he wasn’t into health, period. He didn’t care about any of that stuff. My sisters were very athletic which in turn made their boyfriends very athletic. Every one of their boyfriends that would come over, I would just ask them questions and try to get involved with them, working out. Some took me to the gym, one guy gave me the punching bag, another one gave me his old weight set. I built this gym in my basement. When I was in 8th grade going to 9th grade or something, I spent the entire summer lifting weights, punching the bag, working out and exercising, listening to Metallica in the basement, just busting it and having a great time.

O: I used to listen to Metallica when I was younger. I love punching. I did Aikido, dude, I’m serious, and Krav Maga.

R: You got some aggressions to work out.

O: I do have tons of aggressions. We were talking about the front and how everything looks so perfect on your website, on your social media, I look so calm.

R: What do you mean you look so calm?

O: I look calm and spiritual.

R: On your website?

O: I have my wild side, I have my fire and anger. It’s a part of me, it’s a part of my drive and I like it, as long as you channel it in good ways. The boyfriends gave you the equipment and took you under their wings and then what happened?

R: Basically I followed that until the end of high school, I was on the swimming team, on the wrestling team. You had to workout in the off seasons to get in shape for that. What happened is that I ended up going to an art school, I wanted to become an actor at some point. I went to community college, ended up getting involved in their acting program there and then got into one of the best acting schools, four-year conservatories, in the country.

O: We have so much in common.

R: [00:15:10] Purchase was where I went to acting school. That’s where I met my wife, she was in the dance conservatory. Fitness fell by the wayside, there was no sports teams there. There really wasn’t for actors, there was no time for sports teams, to be honest. We were doing four or five plays a year and we’re rehearsing every night after class. There was really no time to be on a sports team. I was always still trying to go to the gym, still trying to workout. What happened was I graduated, I kept fitness here and there on the back burner sometimes and sometimes I would forget about it altogether. Devon and I moved to Los Angeles. I hadn’t worked out in a while and I started doing this play, [00:15:48], where I had to take my shirt off. I was like, “Shit, I gotta move to it.” I started training for this and getting in good shape and dropping some weight. One of the guys in the show was playing opposite me, I was Achilles and he was playing Ajax. We had to take our shirts off. He’s like 230 pound overweight guy which actually worked quite well for the show itself because he was 6’3 and I’m 5’10. I’m ripped but he’s this big burly guy. Anyway, he, at some point, just said, “How did you get to look like that?” I said, “I worked out everyday and I’ve been dieting and trying to lose some weight.” He’s like, “Would you be willing to train me? Would you be interested?” That’s how I got into personal training. I said, “Sure, I’ll help you.” I took him on as a client. I felt a little bit like a hack in the beginning and then I started to get my certifications from the National Academy of Sports Medicine. After that I just kept getting advance certifications and then trying to build up my business. That’s where the entrepreneur started coming out on me where I realized there are some methods to getting more clients and everything which I found really interesting and started diving into it. Eventually, I realized, being the actor wasn’t necessarily fulfilling me because I wanted to have a more secure lifestyle. The insecurity of being an actor was just way too much.

O: Also, the gratification you get from your clients and the stories and the community, it’s big, it’s true fulfillment. I used to do acting in the past and now I just signup for some improv classes just to keep it because it’s one of my passion. I don’t know if I told you that but I used to be a personal trainer as well.

R: I think you did tell me that. How long ago did you do that?

O: A long time ago. When I just arrived to New York City I studied acting and then I became a personal trainer. I had my own private clients and I taught group coaching and even zumba, lots of things. My path started like that where I actually started in acting and then fitness and then now I’m more into the coaching one on one. Actually I’m more curious about the mind now and finding all kinds of ways to release old patterns and go and dive deep into what is going on in the subconscious mind and not fix it but align it better.

R: I totally agree with you. It’s interesting that you said that because that’s very similar to where Devon and I are going. I think if you do this for a longer period of time, you’ll realize it’s not about the information. Yes, there are people who don’t understand how to work out, there are the people who are like, “I don’t know the first thing about working out. I don’t know what to do when I get to the gym, I don’t know what I should be eating.” That’s a big part but overall, a very small part of the equation, because once you know that stuff, then what’s stopping you? That is your mind. The only thing stopping you is you from anything in your life that you wanna accomplish, that you can’t accomplish. The only thing standing in your way is you.

O: Amen, Rob.

R: If you really aren’t willing to look inside and dissect what’s happening, you’re never gonna be successful. It doesn’t matter what you’re choosing to do, you’re not gonna be successful, unfortunately. Let me back up here a little bit because you might be financially successful but you’re not gonna be happy there because what it took to get there isn’t necessarily a balanced lifestyle and it’s going to take its toll. Going back to what I talked about with Jim Carrey, one of the things that happened with him after he finished, I’m gonna use this as my anchor for every part of my conversation today but one of the things he realized when he played Andy Kaufman was how freeing it was to be that character. When he ended that, they wrapped on that movie and he had to then go back to being Jim Carrey, he realized how much he hated his life, how unfulfilling his life was. If you noticed his career, after that movie, went downhill.

O: What happened to him? I don’t get it. He went into a character that allowed him to be an asshole and he felt really free, that’s what I understood.

R: He was able to say and do anything that he wanted. Jim Carrey as a person, as an icon at that point wasn’t able to speak his mind. He had to put on the face, he had to smile all the time, he had to pretend to be happy and what a lot of comedians do, look what happened to Robin Williams.

O: I love him so much.

R: They put on this face, this clown face with a smile but underneath, there’s just a lot of sorrow and misery and this feeling of not being able to be themselves.

O: I saw pictures, it was a viral article. When you see people that committed suicide, you see pictures of them two or three hours before they committed suicide or two days where they’re like on vacations and they’re smiling or they’re doing this beautiful selfie, the big smile. It’s confusing, like you said. What we see on social media is fake. It’s somewhat true but it’s not the whole picture that’s why so many people feel lack because their level of expectations and what is doesn’t meet, that’s why people get upset, frustrated, angry. What happened with Jim Carrey? How did he lift himself up?

R: He didn’t, he’s in a different place now. He doesn’t wanna be famous anymore, he doesn’t care. They’ll be people who are like bullshit, call bullshit on him. What I really got from it was there’s a whole other side to this spectrum that we are not present to, it’s the side that none of this matters. This whole presentation, this lifestyle presentation on social media, in movies, in our podcasting, we present this world that doesn’t exit. We set people up for this expectation of glory where if you just get to this place, you’ll eventually be happy. In reality, that’s just not how any of this works. The grass is always greener. We’re looking across the street if that person is smiling, taking selfie pictures and they have everything they could possibly want, they have the car, they have the body, they have the wife, the husband, they have the teeth, they have the hair, they have everything we could possibly want, yet inside, they’ll never share with you how miserable they are. They want you to believe that they’re unbelievably happy and it’s sad. The things that we talk about on our podcast, Devon and I, Devon goes to therapy, I go to therapy, we talk about that on the show. We struggle with shit, we don’t pretend that our life is easy, not that we have arguments like crash bank, punch arguments but we are very open like if we have disagreements, we like to be as transparent as we possibly can be. I think our audience appreciates that about us especially with the cursing thing, it’s like, “No, you guys are like a real couple struggling and trying to be as healthy as possible in this crazy fucking world.” It’s one of the reasons why I think that I’m not financially as successful as I could be because I can’t fucking lie about what is healthy. Being healthy is very, very simple, it’s very, very simple, it’s just that everything that you choose to do that gets in your way is inside your mind. That is the thing that most people aren’t gonna talk about. I’m not bashing him in any way like Dave Asprey, I know you’ve had him on the show, I’ve had him on my show too. I’m actually waiting to release that episode, I haven’t released it yet. You can’t sell people products and tell them that’s the cure, you can’t sell people workouts and tell them that’s the cure, the nutrition, the cookbook, all that stuff. That’s the problem. We pretend like all it is is just one more diet plan away from being perfect.

O: It’s not.

R: It’s really not but that’s the people who make a ton of money in this business because they were able to finagle it in a way that it makes it sound like that’s the thing that you need.

O: You know what, maybe I’m naïve, maybe it’s just my hallucination, I think that actually marketing is heading toward the people who speak the truth. If you are the type of person who’s very genuine and real, then you will attract to you the type of people that are of the same vibration. I believe that being true to yourself, even though it might be hard in the beginning, if you look at the big picture, if you look at yourself 10, 20 years from now, I think you will be rewarded for who you are, not for who you pretend to be because that’s just a passing trend.

R: Very true. There are certain, I guess, success markers that we use in our life. I struggle with this, this is one of my biggest struggles, is my success markers. I talk about this on my show sometimes but not very often. I’m trying to word this right to not sound like I’m the total asshole bashing my family. I come from a place where it’s like, “Great, you got a 95 on the test. Why didn’t the teacher gave you five more points to make it 100?” For me, that was a real struggle.

O: You felt like you were never enough.

R: But also, I was rewarded for overworking. This is something I had figured out very early on in my therapy was, when I was kid, I remember specifically second or third grade, I had to do book reports and stuff like that. I was a slow learner, I still, I’m not a fast reader, I have a hard time with reading comprehension, it takes me a long time to get through stuff which is really frustrating for me. As a kid, it was even more frustrating. I would have homework, assignments or whatever, book reports. I would work all night on them and then I would wake up at 4:00 in the morning, I’d have to be at school until 7:00PM or 8:00PM. I would wake up at 4:00 in the morning and I’d start working on my book report again and I would finish it. My parents would reward me for that, they’d say, “Look at what a hard worker Rob is, look how good he is at doing all of these things.” They would brag to their friends, they would brag to the whole family and stuff. What they were doing unknowingly was rewarding my own personal anxiety. They were rewarding me for being so anxious that I couldn’t sleep in in the morning. In retrospect, now I look at it and that’s something that I now carry with me. I carry a lot of anxiety with me because I feel like I’ll never get everything done. If I don’t get it done, there’s something wrong me. The only way to reward myself is if I really put in the time in the work but in reality, who am I proving myself to? I’m 40 years old, who is gonna pat me on the back right now? Nobody. My parents don’t care, I can have a conversation with my mom and say, “Hey mom, I had a really great podcast this week. I had Dave Asprey on the show, he’s one of the most famous guys in the health and wellness arena right now and he was on my show.” She’s like, “Great, what’s a podcast? Tell me what a podcast is again.”

O: My mom is the same. I’m like, mom, I interview people for, I call it my radio show because she doesn’t know what a podcast is.

R: I don’t know how you feel about it but it’s a little bit disheartening when you’re trying to explain to a parent who you want to really be proud of you, it’s hard to explain to a parent what you’re doing if they can’t understand what you’re doing. Therefore, you feel this inadequacy because you can’t explain it in a way that they understand.

O: What I did with my mom, she doesn’t even speak English very well. What I did with her is I went and I just showed her the graphics and had her listen to a little bit of the episode. She’s just like, “You sound so nice.” She can’t even really understand what I’m saying, she’s like, “You sound so nice.” I took the initiative of showing her but also came to an acceptance of this is me, my life, I do it for me, I do it for my mission, to help people light up and shine and get amazing knowledge and touch their hearts and touch their lives. Who’s gonna pat be on the back, I don’t know, but I’m getting karmic points.

R: Karmic points are very important. You’re right. Like I said, I’m not in any way putting this on my parents. All of this is my own shit. This is the way that I was brought up, I could’ve completely interpreted every situation differently as a kid and programmed myself to respond in a different way or to live in a different way, it’s just that the way that I chose to take in that information and then make that my way of living was my own personal choice. I can’t change that now, all I can be now is present and that’s why it’s really important, like you were mentioning earlier, it’s how you have to really be mindful, paying attention to how you’re thinking, what’s happening inside your mind. When that does happen, when I get really down on myself, that I’m not working hard enough, you say how great my website looks but meanwhile five minutes earlier I might be like, “Man, my website looks like a shit.”

O: No, it’s great. It’s awesome.

R: I’m not, I’m just saying.

O: I was impressed, I was like, “I have to do some of those things on my website now.”

R: It really comes down to how we self-love.

O: Self-love is the key.

R: We have to create now our new internal mom or parent or whatever it is that you needed, that thing that you somehow pushed aside. It’s not necessarily the healthiest way that you take care of yourself. That’s a big, big part of the equation if we’re gonna bring it full circle, that’s the big missing piece that most people aren’t talking about.

O: Rob, you know how we talk about we look at the person and the grass is greener, I look at you, I saw a photo of you shirtless on your website. I was like, “Damn, I wanna be that fit.” When I was a personal trainer, I was way more fit. I almost had a six pack. That’s what I did. Everyday I went to the gym, my friends were trainers, training was on top of mind and nutrition was top of mind. I was surrounded by people that do fitness, fitness, fitness. Now that I am more of an entrepreneur, there are way more hours in the day where I’m in front of my computer trying to figure out my marketing and to put content out there, produce my podcast, coach my clients, I’m gonna create a course online, there’s so much to do. Fitness and nutrition, it’s not my highest value anymore. On the other hand, I do wanna go back to the same awesome shape I was in. Please, work life balance for a super busy, sometimes frustrated, sometimes overly emotional entrepreneurs, especially women like me. Let’s talk about me.

R: There’s no better way to give an example of how someone can change their lifestyle than just using somebody as a guinea pig. Let’s use you. Creating your programs and having the podcast and all these different things that are in your life right now.

O: So much, I can’t even tell you. It’s like it’s never ending, everyday there’s more to do, more to do, more to do.

R: It never, never ends. This is interesting because last night I was having a conversation with Devon very similar to this in that it’s like, “Dev, I don’t think you understand.” Devon is a part of the podcast but she’s not necessarily part of the business, the backend business stuff that I do, the website design, the lead pages we do, the email list, the Facebook stuff, she’s not necessarily a part of all that. She’s like the performer aspect of it but not necessarily the producer side of it. I was having the conversation and I’m listing all the stuff. Right now if I said what are a bunch of things that are on your plate right now, you can rattle off.

O: Oh my god, thousands.

R: It never ends and it never will end. There was a business coach that I had years ago who said, “Rob, the work will never end. You can’t expect to ever get finished with it.”

O: No, I want it to end. I just wanna show up and have everybody else do everything for me and then rub my feet and feed me grapes.

R: You’re becoming very, very similar to some princess of some sort.

O: I am a goddess.

R: You’re a goddess, alright. Somebody get on that. Please, just take care of Orion, she needs your help.

O: I just wanna say my husband is awesome, he’s taking care of me.

R: Is he massaging your feet right now?

O: Not now, but there is always the next level.

R: We have this conversation last night. One of the things that came up for me was I don’t know how much I can handle because I have all these things going on and I said, “The one thing that I’m good at outside of all this business shit is being healthy within it.” It’s the one thing that I’m good at, it’s the one thing that I feel confident in. It’s like no matter how much shit I pile on my plate, I still choose to do some physical activity and I choose to feed myself good food. It’s crazy because most of the time, most of us, what we do is we stop at McDonalds or we stop at some fast-food place, we buy something cheap and easy and simple or we drink cola, we drink lots of different kinds of bad caffeinated drinks everyday just to get through and we don’t take care of ourselves.

O: I’m having a coffee right now.

R: It could be fine unless it’s all day long. I’ve had that issue too where I drink way too much coffee because I’m relying on the caffeine to get through the day.

O: When I was a trainer, I had to wake up at 4:00AM or 5:00AM, I used to drink so much coffee, not anymore. You know what, when you look at my diet, it’s organic, it’s clean, tons of super foods because I know nutrition, I’m into biohacking, I know a lot about a lot but I don’t have time to cook, my husband doesn’t cook, I have to do all the cooking. If I don’t do the cooking, nobody does the cooking. It’s like, “I don’t have time. I’m bored with my own food.”

R: You just said that you do pretty good with food but then you said you don’t have time to cook. When you’re not cooking, are you eating terrible?

O: Yes, I eat frozen pizza.

R: You know what’s healthy and then yet you choose to eat frozen pizza.

O: Because it’s yummy, it’s easy, it’s fast and I’m tired and it’s been a long day.

R: In the moment it’s taking care of yourself because you don’t wanna necessarily have to worry about cooking but in the long run or the retro, you’re not necessarily taking care of yourself because you probably feel guilty about that and shitty that you ate that food and you feel worse energetically.

O: I suppress those feelings.

R: Exactly, you turn that off.

O: I’m like, “No, it’s fine. I ate it because I need it.”

R: In the moment you’re telling yourself that like, “I have no other choice right now because there’s really nothing else to eat and I don’t have any time to go food shopping. There’s nothing else in the fridge and this is my only option.” You make that decision. If you’re making that decision once a week or maybe twice a week, that’s not probably a problem. If it’s half the time and you say that you want your health to be a priority, well then, honestly, you’re health is not a priority because if it was a priority, you’d be thinking about it more. That’s just the nutrition part of it. The same thing applies for the fitness part of it whether or not you choose to take a walk everyday or go for a hike everyday or do yoga everyday or just do some pushups everyday. If I said to you in terms of your business and your podcast. How often do you post your podcast? Once a week, right? Your podcast goes out once a week but you’re only gonna work on your podcast every other week, is that gonna work?

O: No.

R: Because your podcast is a priority and it has to go out every week. If you wanna be healthy and you want to continually either lose weight or get toned or see some results, you can’t work on it half the time, you can’t work on it sometimes and then sometimes not. It has to be a part of your daily life in some capacity, it doesn’t have to be your whole entire life. It has to be a part of your life just like brushing your teeth is a part of your life, just like combing your hair is a part of your life, just like putting on your makeup is a part of your life. You spent how much time putting on makeup today?

O: Five minutes, I don’t put a lot of makeup.

R: That’s fine. You can do something in five minutes.

O: 20 pushups and 10 jumping jacks and then a little sprint in place.

R: I have these challenges in my group challenge, we do one minute of push ups, one minute of squats, one minute of burpees and one minute of tuck jumps or sit ups. Every single exercise is one minute but it’s a five-minute workout.

O: Five minutes workout everyday, is it very effective? Do you see many changes in people?

R: Here’s the thing, it’s not about being effective, it’s about creating consistency. Just like with your podcast, you might do a podcast every single week. At first you start off a five-minute podcast and your podcast sucks, it’s not getting any results, nobody is downloading it, maybe five or six people are downloading it. It’s not really all that inspiring but then you start investing some more time in it. You’ve already built the weekly timeframe that you’re going to work on your podcast. As the weeks go by and the months go by, you start adding a little more because you’re learning a little more. It’s a part of your lifestyle now. This is how you build up your health, you start small, you start etching out 15 minutes, 20 minutes. What am I gonna do? There’s a guy that I interviewed on my show, Dan John. He doesn’t recommend anybody working out the first three months. He says, “Here’s what you need to do, the first month, the whole entire month, all you have to do, put your sneakers on and walk to the mailbox and back. That’s it, that’s all I want you to do. It’s gonna take you three minutes. I want you to put your sneakers on and walk to the mailbox and back. I need you to do that every single day for a month.” How long is it gonna take you? Three minutes to do that, put your sneakers on, walk to the mailbox, walk back. Okay great, three minutes. If you don’t do it, whose fault is it? Are you really gonna tell me three minutes was too much? You’re gonna tell me, “I just didn’t have time, Rob. I couldn’t do it, something came up. I couldn’t find the three minutes.” Seriously? If you’re not finding that three minutes, that’s inside your mind. If you were able to do that and stick with that for three minutes, okay great. You did the whole month, fantastic, you nailed it. Now what do we do? Now you walk to the end of the street and back for the next month. You don’t have to worry about how long is that gonna take you, seven minutes to walk to end of the street, to the stop sign and back. Great, okay, that’s all I need you to do. Now you have two months of having some consistency where every single day, you have that one thing that you have to do. The next month you add in, okay I’m gonna walk around the block this time, it’s gonna take me 12 minutes. Now what you’ve done is created consistency. Every other day, instead of doing the walk, we swap it out for something. Maybe we do, instead of the walk, we swap it out for five minutes of doing something like pushups or squat jumps or something like that or squats or whatever it is depending on your physical capabilities or if you didn’t wanna break up your walks, what you can do is you can add one thing to the finish of every single one of your workouts where you do one minute. This is something I did with one of my clients who’s obese. He would get back from his walk, it would be a 15 or 20 minute walk and I’m like, “Okay great.” We haven’t done any weightlifting, the guy lost 60 pounds, we haven’t done any weightlifting, we haven’t done anything besides walking and changing his diet. I said, “We’re gonna start changing things. When you get back to the house, I want you to go to the dining room, I want you to sit down and stand up at your dining room table, touch your ass to the chair and stand back up. I want you to do that for one minute. I want you to write down how many times you’re able to sit down and stand up in one minute then I want you to go the kitchen calendar. I want you to do push ups off the calendar and I want you to do as many as you can in one minute and I want you to write that down. Everyday, after you’re done with your walk, I want you to do that.” That’s two more minutes added on. It’s not gonna make you sweat, it’s only sit down and stand up for a minute and do some pushups for a minute. It’s not gonna make you sweat but it’s training your body and your mind to keep and continuously do that thing. This way you can eventually get out of your own way. It sounds really, really simple and stupid, like, “What’s the point of all of that?” In reality, when we’re talking about business, all you need to do is be consistent. People aren’t gonna continue to listen to your podcast if it’s inconsistent.

O: If you listen to my podcast, can you just review it and let me know that you like it so I’ll keep doing it and then I’ll have the motivation? Just a side note.

R: A good thing that I do within my community sometimes is I host little challenges for people to leave reviews like a book giveaway. For people that I’ve had on my show like Mark Sisson or Dave Asprey or something like that.

O: I’m gonna have Mark on my show too.

R: He’s great. Mark is awesome. You just have a book review contest where people, if they like your show and they wanna leave a review, you need to give them a little bit of a kick in the butt, then just say, “If you leave a review, you’re automatically entered into picking these five or ten books.” Whoever wins, you pick the name out of the hat, you send them a message and you say, “Which book do you want?” And then you send them that book.

O: That sounds great.

R: Everybody wins. People that are writing your reviews, they just needed a little bit of incentive to write the review and then they get the book and you get a review and everybody’s happy.

O: Rob, you talked about consistency, you talked about building a habit, you talked about creating momentum. I wanna go with you a little deeper and more into the beginning of everything which is desire. How do you ignite that fire? How do you create desire on a deep level where it’s not motivation but it’s inspiration that comes from within?

R: That’s a tough question. Let me unpack that and tell you why. I recently had somebody ask me that question, how do you motivate people to be self-motivated? Maybe there’s more to this and I’m not saying it but I’ll tell you what is a great motivator, rock bottom. Rock bottom is a great motivator. Going to the doctor getting a blood test, finding out that your cholesterol is high and that you’re at high risk of heart disease. Going to the doctor finding that your blood sugar is too high and you’re prediabetic or you’re actually even worse, you’re diabetic and you didn’t even know. Having all of these different things, going to the doctor and having arthritis or just different things. You went out and you hangout with some friends and you realized that you can’t walk up a flight of stairs, you had maybe this quasi panic attack or you feel like what might’ve been a heart attack. Things like that are rock bottom. I remember, when I was 22 years old, I used to smoke. This is when I was going to college and I was an actor, I used to smoke a pack a day. I smoked a pack a day for 10 years. It’s amazing because most people would look at me and go, “I cannot believe or even imagine you’re smoking.” Imagine an actor living in New York, grew up in New York, the whole family smoked. That’s what we did, everybody smoked. I remember I went to Fire Island which is this Long Island, it’s a great place to hangout in summertime. I took a ferry to Fire Island, I took a ferry home, it was raining out when we got back. My car was about maybe half mile away, maybe a mile. I was “the fittest” out of everybody. I was, “I’ll run to the car and go and come back to pick everybody up.” I ran to my car, I coughed for I’m not even kidding you, maybe an hour or two hours and a half. I realized how out of shape I was in that moment, that was a good rock bottom moment for me where I was like, “I need to change something.” I think it was immediate there, I think I stopped smoking for how long it lasted at that point, maybe six months or a year, I stopped smoking because that’s what smokers do, they quit and they go back and they quit and they go back. In terms of motivation, I can’t motivate anybody to call me, nobody is gonna call me, what am I talking about? Nobody is gonna call me and say, “Rob, motivate me.” They’re gonna call me and go, “I’m at the end of my rope, I don’t know what to do, I listened to your show, I read some of your blogs, I think that you resonate with me. I’d love some help, what do you think I should do?”

O: Take my biggest package right now.

R: I consider myself to be a fairly easy person to talk to.

O: You are.

R: I can’t help people if they’re not honest with me. If people are really struggling and they’re honest about what their struggles are, then I can truly help them. Like you said, it really is about mindset, it really is this therapy where you realize what is in your way and how do you spot that before it happens. That kind of realization is a motivator, is a driving force behind it. All they need is some tools to get the moment to build up. Once the momentum is there, then they’re often right. When you get the training wheels off when you’re a kid and you start to ride and you’re all wobbly in shit and you might fall over sometimes, that’s what it’s like when you’re trying to get healthy for the first time in your life. It’s not gonna feel comfortable, it’s not gonna feel right, it’s gonna feel really fucking scary because everything feels different, everything that you’re doing on a day to day feels different and you feel like you’re really not good at it. That’s okay, that’s where you should be. That’s normal to be in that place when you’re just trying to get healthy for the first time. If you think you’re gonna do it on your own, maybe you can, that’s totally cool. If people wanna do it on their own, I’d love that if they could pull it off. It’s like anything in life. I tried to build my online business, I’m not gonna pretend like I designed my website. I didn’t designed my website, I hired a coach who helped me with my business. At the end of training, I was like, “I think I need you help with this website.” I paid him to help me with the website, I didn’t do that on my own. Unless I have some training background in it, I’m gonna have to hire somebody to help me. Why would it be different for health? If you grew up in a lifestyle where your parents were unhealthy, your family was unhealthy, you never worked out in your life, you’re maybe 50 or 60 pounds overweight which even put you in a bigger hole and then you expect to be able to turn this around and rely on P90X to get you out of it, chances are it’s gonna be a longer road than that. That’s the thing that I like to work on with people. I love that, I love helping people really solve that. I have a harder time, my clients aren’t necessarily people who are like, “Rob, just give me the workout. Tell me what to do and I’ll do it.” That’s not my clients, I don’t even like working with people like that. I like helping people who really do need help.

O: Like I said, they have to be ready, willing, and able because if they’re just complaining all the time and skipping sessions, it’s making it harder on the coach and on the person that is studying with the coach because they have to bring their own motivations. With my clients, the clients that have got the fastest and most mind blowing results are the ones that invested into it and they were committed, fully committed and they did their homework and they showed up on time. They will buy the book, they were consistent, they have their own desire to change because they probably, they do, they hit rock bottom. I do have a technique to help people before they hit rock bottom, before they get the heart attack.

R: Let’s hear it.

O: Doctor Demartini, have you heard of him?

R: No.

O: He was on the movie The Secret, I also interviewed him here on the podcast. He’s got a value assessment, it’s a series of questions that will lead you to your highest values. We all have four highest values in our lives, they look according to our highest values. That means that if your highest value is money, body, family, and travel, this is what you’re gonna do, this is what you’re gonna be great at. If you wanna be a millionaire and money is number 8 or 10 or 20, you’ll never be a millionaire. If you wanna have a great body but it’s not one of your first four values, then you won’t invest. For me, even though I was whining about me not going to the gym, I still have my body as the first four. I still take pretty good care of my body. I had a group coaching, I did a program in the past that’s called Vibrant Body Bootcamp. It was an online program, I had a group of women. I had them take this assessment to see where is their highest values. One of them, I don’t remember exactly what were her highest values but body was way down there but family, kids, her family, her kids, it was number one. If you wanna take something that is on a lower priority and connect it to the highest value, I had to show her ways that taking care of herself and her body will be beneficial to her kids and her family. All my conversations with her was like, “You are the role model for your kid. When you teach your kid to eat bad, then they’re gonna become obese. They see you and they imitate everything that you do and not everything that you say.” I just kept talking to her and talking to her and kept linking her family, highest value, to body, lower value, and bringing that value up. Family and body became linked. She started dropping the weight, getting into a healthy lifestyle. Her husband did a sugar challenge. It created a ripple effect in her family, that was because I linked with the help of Mr. Demartini that brought this technique to my life. I linked the lower value to the highest and then it helped her move forward in the direction of what she really want to achieve in life.

R: That’s a really good association and connector for those people. I’ve seen it go two ways on that but I can understand why it would definitely work for a lot of people. I’ve heard many people talk about it and myself as well. You can’t help people in your life unless you’re willing to help yourself first.

O: There is a limit. Some self-induced desire must be there but this is just a tool to elevate that desire.

R: Think about it like this. If you’re sitting on a plane and you lose elevation and the airbags drop, you’re supposed to put it on your face first.

O: Before assisting others.

R: That’s right. That’s exactly what this is. If you really do wanna be a role model for your family, we’ve had people in my community that talk about like, “My mom, she’s not healthy, my dad, my boyfriend, my husband, they’re not healthy.” I tell them what they should eat, I tell them what’s healthy for them, I tell them what they should do in the workouts.

O: It’s not what you say, it’s who you are, it’s how you are showing up in the world, people, kids, people around you, they don’t care about what you say, it’s the energy behind it. Are you a living proof of what you preach? Are you an example?

R: They’re going to follow you if they see what you’re doing is working and they see what you’re doing is exciting and fun and energetic and you’re really living that lifestyle and it’s like holy, Orion, it looks amazing, she eats really well, she works out all the time, she’s building her business, she has a lot going on and she’s able to manage all of it. Yes, it’s struggling but she makes her personal health and wellness a priority in her life which therefore makes me wanna be more like that which is like, “I’ll start trying that equation.” I guarantee it’ll work because there’s nobody that’s worked out and left the gym or ate a healthy meal and said, “That was disgusting, that was terrible.” There’s always this great feeling after you’re done doing something positive for yourself. If you continued to do it, there’s going to be benefits and there’s gonna be a payoff. It really is all about being that role model for the people around you, you can’t point the figure, you gotta always turn it back at yourself. You are the only person stopping you from achieving it. You are not going to be the person who’s gonna make anybody achieve anything else unless they come to you. This is one of the reasons, what do you to motivate people? Unless they come to me based on all the things that I’m doing and they’re inspired by what I do and they want to basically understand what I do and how I do it, I can’t motivate. I think maybe there’s this disconnect in terms of what you are asking and maybe I wasn’t necessarily understanding it. Once somebody is my client, I know that they’re motivated. Using the tactic of attaching their own personal health to the health of their family, to their generations beyond, that’s a tactic.

O: Their legacy, their business, their performance. Like you said, when your body is in good shape, then it affects everything in your life.

R: That is a tactic that we use as coaches to get people grounded to what’s really important to them and to get them to really make health and wellness a part of their life in a way that’s meaningful to them. It’s a great motivator but it’s not a motivator from the beginning. How often does this happen to you when you tell people that you’re a health coach or something like that and then they say, “What should I do if I wanna lose weight?” You give them information and they’ll never gonna do it. They just want the information, they’ll never gonna do it. If they came to you and they’re like, “You look amazing. Can we talk? I would love to pick your brain about maybe working together.” That would be somebody that you’d definitely be able to help. They have to be serious and ready for your help.

O: Before we finish, I have so much to talk to you about. Maybe we can have you back on the show. Just quick tips for entrepreneurs with food prep and exercises. If somebody’s really busy, what will be your top tips for food prepping and scheduling and exercise routine?

R: Food prepping is very, very simple. I like to call it batch cooking. Don’t think of food prep as I cook my meal for the next day and then pack it up. I look at every meal as an opportunity to cook five meals. If I’m gonna make steak, I’ll make two. If I’m gonna make chicken, I’ll make a whole tray of chicken. Devon and I do this, we make chili, we make soups, we make casseroles, we make this big thing. Casserole takes 10 minutes to prepare. You throw it in the pan or in a pyrex and you throw it in the oven for half an hour or 45 minutes. You have seven meals, it’s enough to feed a family but if you’re just a husband and wife, it’s enough to feed you breakfast and lunch for two days.

O: What if I have a high value on protein, animal protein and my husband is a vegetarian. For me it’s always cooking twice.

R: He is a vegetarian. What does he get for his protein source?

O: He does eat fish every once in a blue moon.

R: Fish is gonna have to be on your menu at least three days a week, I would say, and different variations obviously so you don’t get tired of it. There are great fish recipes. There’s a girl that listens to my podcast, Gina, she’s from Alaska. She gets the best Alaskan salmon. They freeze it for the entire summer. She’s writing right now in my website, depending I guess when this goes up. It’s a Salmon Fajitas recipe that you cook on a sheet pan where you can make a whole entire salmon fillet, the whole thing and you get a ton of food out of it. Thing like that, you wanna be able to make in bulk, this way you guys can have that. Fish soup is a phenomenal one.

O: How don’t you get tired of it? I’ll tell you, I have been through the fitness model type diets, I’ve tried many things, I’ve tried Paleo, I’ve tried no carbs, I’ve tried many things but I don’t find those things to be so sustainable because I fall off the wagon, I get tired and I slide back.

R: This is a really good point because a lot of people struggle with the same thing. Here’s where I think you went is that you’re following a diet. Following a specific diet is usually a great recipe failure eventually because there are certain restrictions that come with having a very specific diet. You feel like you can’t have those other things, you can’t have rice if you’re a Paleo, you can’t have meat if you’re a vegetarian, you can’t have gluten ball, I guess gluten free is one thing. If you’re having a very specific diet, all you’re doing is reminding your body and your mind that you can’t have something instead of just being open to having everything. What are the things that we like to do? There is also being an adult within this.

O: That’s a hard one for me.

R: If you know that eating gluten or having sugar or drinking alcohol has a negative effect on you and you do it anyway, that’s you not being an adult.

O: That’s not self-love.

R: That’s not self-love. For Devon and I, one of the things that we notice is if I drink alcohol, it could be a glass of wine, a beer or whatever it is at night with dinner, I don’t sleep well. If I have to get up at 4:30 in the next day for a client and I only have three or four hours of sleep because I was up half the night because I had to have a glass of wine, who’s really getting hurt in that situation? Only me. Maybe I’m going out with some friend and they’re like, “You want a beer?” I’m like, yeah, because I wanna be social. Why would I set myself up for that? The point is that you design a lifestyle of eating that works for you. If it’s Paleo with a little bit of vegetarian, with a little bit of rice, with a little bit of Mediterranean in there as well where you’re eating some gluten, I don’t care as long as what you’re doing serves you. Everything in your life that you choose to do, if it’s not serving you, then you gotta really come back and ask yourself, “Why am I doing this thing that’s hurting me?” That’s always the ultimate question.

O: Do I ask why am I doing it or do I ask how do I change it?

R: This really important actually, you wanna be present with what’s happening in the moment. When you go into autopilot mode, will you throw that frozen pizza in the oven or you stop at In’N’Out Burger and you’re ordering your animal style French fries, stop yourself for a moment and go, “Is this what I want for my own personal health? Am I taking care of myself in this moment?” If the answer to that question is no, then you really need to assess why you’re doing it.

O: I have to be a snob here and say that I never go to fast food places. My frozen pizza is organic. I’m joking. We look at it like it’s organic and it’s this and it’s this and doesn’t mean anything. It means a little but not a lot.

R: The question then would be how do you feel after you eat the organic pizza? Do you feel good?

O: I feel good.

R: Do you have any digestive issues after you finish it?

O: Yeah, I start farting.

R: What does that indicate?

O: That indicates that it’s not that good for me.

R: Because you’re not digesting it properly. You might have some fatigue or you just feel slightly lethargic after because your body is maybe processing the gluten, I don’t know, that might not be the problem for you. You might just have the lactose intolerance.

O: You know what I noticed, actually I went gluten free for a while. For me specifically, eating gluten every once in awhile is not a big deal, it actually gives me energy maybe because I’m from the Mediterranean and it’s a part of my ancestry and what they ate. They eat a lot of breads and stuff like that. Like you said, everything in moderation. Before we finish, thank you so much. This was amazing, amazing, mind blowing, awesome. What are your three top tips to living a stellar life?

R: One, I guess, would be being true to yourself and listening to yourself. Two, would be, if you wanna succeed in anything, you have to create the map, you can’t get anywhere without a map. That map is gonna change as days go by, as hours go by. The map is gonna change but you have to literally have an eye on what you’re working towards whether it’d be your health, your business, whatever it is. If you’re trying to go in blind and expecting to reach some magical place of success, you’re never gonna get there. I would say the other thing which is just popping into my head as I talk is we can’t go with this alone. All boats rise with the tide. Create a community around all of the things that you do. Find people that think the way you think and want what you want and bring them into your circle and life is gonna get hell of a lot easier.

O: I know you have courses online, I know you have a beautiful community, you have a podcast. People who want to listen to your podcast, maybe do some one on one with you or purchase you coaching, where can they go?

R: If you’re interested in one on one coaching, you can go to openskyfitness.com/coaching. I have packages. We can work together once a week, every other week or once a month. A lot of my clients I work with once a week especially in the beginning when you’re trying to build momentum, you need a little more hand holding. I also have a challenge that’s happening actually right now. I don’t know when you’re gonna release this but the new challenge is coming up on January 22nd. It’s an eight-week challenge, we have a small group of people that go through eight weeks of body weight workouts that are no longer than 20 minutes, some are 12 minutes. Every single day, except for Sunday, you have something to do. This is perfect for the entrepreneur who’s busy, who’s like, “I don’t really have time.” You push yourself away from your desk, you find 15 minutes, 20 minutes to do these body weight workouts, no equipment required, no gym membership required, you get a little sweat on, towel off and you get back to work. That’s gonna be happening on January 22nd. If anybody is interested in hearing or reading more about that and signing up for the waiting list for that, that’s openskyfitness.com/challenge. That’s pretty easy because it’s the Sky Fitness Challenge and it’s openskyfitness.com/challenge to get on the waiting list. In terms of the podcast, if you go to openskyfitness.com, you’ll see all the podcast episodes listed there, we’re on iTunes and everywhere else. I’m gonna add this in, if you like this style of conversation and you want to be a part of a community of people that really do hold each other accountable and also share all their wins and their losses and their kicks in the nuts and their kicks in the blanks and you really do want to be a part of something like that, that’s the Open Sky Fitness Podcast Group on Facebook. If you go to Facebook and you just search Open Sky Fitness Podcast Group, you’ll find it there. It’s one of those close groups, only cool people allowed. You guys are invited.

O: You guys are cool. Thank you for saying kick in the blank, I appreciate it, all my ladies appreciate it too. Thank you very much, Rob. Thank you very much, it was awesome.

R: Orion, thank you so much. I appreciate the time.