Live Life with No Regrets with David Wood

A Personal Note from Orion

Being vulnerable can be risky – but wouldn’t you agree that it’s the risks in life that make life worth living? If you never venture into the unknown, if you let yourself be held back by fear, I bet there are many things in your life that will pass you buy, when they could have changed the course of your destiny forever.

Vulnerability exposes the most inner truths of ourselves and for that reason, many people equate vulnerability with weakness. But being vulnerable is actually a sign of bravery – you are risking the most fragile parts of yourself, knowing well that you could get hurt by rejection, shame, or ridicule, but you do it anyway. And at the end of the day, you want to live a life of no regrets, and not look back on what you didn’t do, because you were too afraid.

Many of my clients are strong, independent women who have trouble with the idea of vulnerability when it comes to relationships. They are alpha females who have been hurt in the past, who feel that wearing their heart on their sleeve is putting their emotional well-being at risk. But it’s precisely this risk, that of being vulnerable, which is the only way you can forge a deep connection with your soulmate. My guest today, David Wood, built the largest coaching business on the web, and joins me today to share how his personal life path has inspired his innate ability to help people live an open life, with no regrets.

About Today’s Show

Hello and welcome to Stellar Life Podcast. This is your host, Orion. Life can be difficult, and sometimes when you’re in the grind where when things don’t go your way, it’s hard to see the bigger picture. And you get sucked into the everyday drama or just the small mundane things that you do every day. But If you take a step back and you look at your life, you want to live a life with no regrets. At the end of your day, you want to look back and say, “Yes, I’ve done it. I’ve achieved it. I have no regrets.”

I climbed Mount Kilimanjaro, I went and did this business deal that I wanted to do and I created a beautiful family. Whatever it is for you, go for your goals and dreams. So when you look back, you won’t regret it. You won’t regret the life that you have. And we’re under the illusion that there is so much time, and there are so many things that are delayed to “someday, maybe.” But now is a good time to go for your goals and dreams.

Get Paid For Who You Are by David Wood

As my guest today said, “When you are 10,000 feet above the Himalayas, hanging from a piece of cloth, you see life differently.” David Wood coaches high-performing entrepreneurs, executives, and leaders to play the best game they possibly can. He coaches thousands of hours in dozens of countries around the globe, and he’s the author of Get Paid for Who You Are with a foreword from Jack Canfield. David built the world’s largest coaching business serving huge audiences worldwide, teaching them about living a regret-free life. And now without further ado, on to the show.

Hey, David, and welcome to Stellar Life podcast. It’s wonderful to have you here.

Thank you. I’m feeling pretty good already.

I’m feeling pretty good just talking to you. We talked a little bit before and you just seem like such a great guy.

I feel like I know you. We just met and you’re so easy to talk to. It’s like we’re just hanging out. I just showed you my puppy.

Oh, your puppy is so cute.

I feel like we’ve been friends for a while.

That’s beautiful. Why don’t we start by you sharing a little bit about your passion? Why do you do what you do? How did you start?

I’m a geek. I’m an absolute geek for personal growth, transformation, communication, and deep connection. I suspect it’s because I didn’t grow up with that. I had a tragedy when I was young. I think all of us have had something in our lives as we grew up that might have interrupted or impacted us in some way. Mine was when I was seven years old, my five-year-old sister died in a traffic accident and I watched it happen. I was there, no parents around, I witnessed that, and then I grew up without a sister. I didn’t know that anything was happening, I didn’t know that I didn’t grieve, I didn’t know that I learned not to feel and to shut my feelings down, I didn’t know that I learned to use my left brain, to be intellectual, to get super smart, and create results in time and space, and geek out on systems. That’s what I developed.

If you never show your vulnerability, people connect with you on a superficial level, and not with the person behind the mask. Click To Tweet

It worked really well. I became a consulting actuary to Fortune 100 companies in New York. I was enjoying it, but something was missing because I was working with people around numbers and not working with people about people. Fortunately, I discovered a personal growth course. I thought these people smile too much and they were wearing name tags. I don’t trust them at all but I’m going to get in and out and that’s all. I’m not going to become a self-help junkie because I saw those people who do personal growth as weak. They just can’t work out their own life. That was my viewpoint. Fortunately, they cracked me open, they cracked my cynicism, and I got to see that there were massive amounts of things I did not know how to do, particularly in the relational area.

I quit my job on Park Avenue and went back to Australia. I spent the last 20 years learning how to feel, realizing I have a body, realizing this body has information to tell me—I just became aware of my body as I said that—and learning how to reveal the parts of myself that I didn’t even want to reveal to myself. What is it about me that I don’t like? What am I worried people might find out? Can I accept that? Can I actually love that? And then, am I willing to take the risk to reveal that to the people that matter to me? And that’s been a 20-year journey. Now, I coach high-performers and I can bring the business stuff—let’s talk about systems and results, time and space, I’m all over that—and how’s your relationship with your kids? How’s your relationship with your partner? How’s your relationship…

With your puppy.

…with your puppy? Truly, my relationship with my puppy is being influenced by all the work I’ve been doing in the last six months. I’m feeling my body as I’m with my puppy. I’m opening up and I’m feeling my heart. I want both of these for the world. I want great business results and success, and when you’re on your deathbed, I want you to have zero regrets knowing that you gave it all, and that includes your heart.

What are some of the things you’ve achieved so far where on your deathbed, you can look back and say, “Wow, I did this. This is amazing”?

What a great question. I’m proud of some of the business stuff, I’m proud that I published a book with Jack Canfield writing the foreword, I’m proud that I did that.

He’s great.

I’m proud of joining the Transformational Leadership Council with Jack, John Gray, and Don Miguel Ruiz. I’m proud of that. I’m proud of building what was the world’s largest coaching business. It just feels good to have some success around that but the things I’m probably most proud of is on the personal side. I’m proud that I’m happily divorced from a wonderful woman, that I’ve kept that relationship. 15 years after being divorced, last year, I just went and stayed with her, her new husband, and her six-year-old kid, and I’m Uncle David.

Wow, nice.

I’m proud of things like that, the relationships that could have gone off the rails and I’ve been able to use techniques and skills to bring them back and to stay in love. I just completed with an ex-girlfriend who, for 11 years, I did not want to be friends with her. I finally got some ninja coaching that helped me get clear to a pathway. I was vulnerable with her, I shared what was in the way, she apologized for everything she’d done in our relationship, and I just wept and wept. I’m proud of that. I’m proud that I was willing to risk being vulnerable with her. The calls I’ve made, I’ve called people from my past from high school, bullies from high school that I’ve been upset with and I’ve completed with them. That took a lot of courage and I’m proud of that.

That’s amazing. There are so many things that you spoke about that I can resonate with. Me and my husband, we’re like two sides of the same coin, even though I noticed that because after the years we’ve been together, we adopted each other’s traits where at the beginning, I was the wild, all over the place one, all right brain, and he was very structured, strategic, analytical left brain. Now he’s making jokes that I was like, “Wow, this is something that I would say,” and I am becoming more strategic, which is awesome.

I can also see his childhood was very difficult. It gave me, like what you said, an insight into how he developed because he’s a genius and he taught himself computer language when he was 11. He is really brilliant at what he does— a very smart man—and I can see how that was just developing the left brain was blocking him from his emotions and from his body. Since we’re together, he’s much more in tune and much more embodied, plus he did a lot of work on his own that has nothing to do with me. I like to take some credit, but it’s all his job.

Whatever trauma you’ve been through deserves healing. You can move on from your past and be happy again.

I’m sure you’re to blame for a lot of the good things that happened to him. I want that for everybody. There are some clients that come to me who have the left brain stuff, they’re really good with the systems, things are working quite well, but the relationships aren’t quite humming. Also, if they’re honest, their relationship with themselves. They’re not liking themselves as much as they could.

Then, you’ve got other people who might be really good with some of the feelings and they could use more structure, they could use more planning, they could use more productivity. I listen and then like, “What is it that we can add? What’s that piece that we could add that would have you be what you’re talking about with a balance of both sides?”

You strike me as a very good listener.

Thank you. I like hearing that. I am still working on it because sometimes, like someone just said something yesterday and I went straight to defense, I wanted to just tell my side of it. Sometimes I got to always grab myself and go, “Wait, let’s get their world first. What’s going on over there?” It’s so hard to make that switch or to catch it.

I had a friend, she’s delivering training, someone came up to her in the break, and was mad at her. He’s like, “You shouldn’t have done that, you shamed that guy, and blah-blah-blah.” She started to say, “The reason I did that,” and I whispered one word in her ear, “Aikido.”

I studied Aikido and I studied MMA and I know the difference.

Nice. For those who don’t know, for our listeners, Aikido is redirecting energy using someone’s energy against them, de-escalating. Would that sound right?

Aikido is about being defensive rather than offensive and it’s an art where a 100-pound woman can take down a 300-pound man with ease because you are just guiding their energy to the floor.

Their energy, that’s right. We teach something called emotional Aikido, how to handle it when someone’s coming at you with a lot of charge. She started to defend and I just whispered, “Aikido.”

We are hard on ourselves, carry so much guilt, and often lock ourselves in a cage, wondering if somebody has the key, not realizing we do because we built that cage. Click To Tweet

What did she do?

She switched, she stopped speaking, she turned her body to really face him, and she said, “What I’m hearing you say is,” and she reflected back to him what she was hearing and then she said, “Is there more? Tell me more because I really want to get this.”

It sounds like Imago Dialogue.

I haven’t heard of that.

Oh, it’s a tool by Harville Hendrix for relationships where, in a fighting situation where you fight with your partner and everything is very intense and escalating, you just say, “Can we have an Imago Dialogue right now?” and then they say, “Yes, now,” or, “No, in three hours.” Three hours, you sit together and it’s always one-sided, meaning you are the listener but only the listener or you are the ones who complain. The questions are, “Tell me more.” You really listen, “Is there more? Did I get it?” Reflect back, “Did I get everything?” “No, you didn’t, there is more.”

Yes, and that’s hard.

Then you go into empathy and you say, “It makes sense that you feel the way you feel and I can understand that you feel the way you feel.” You don’t even have to agree with them, but people just want to feel gotten. The moment people feel gotten by you and they know that you’ve listened, everything is calming down and they’re like, “Okay, he’s actually on my side. We are lovers and we can make this relationship happen.”

It’s an ongoing practice for me. Someone just texted me and said, “I’m disappointed with the photo you took yesterday,” I wanted to explain, “You gave me two minutes notice. I’m not a photographer. I had propped it against a cushion and set a timer.” I wanted to say all that, I stopped, and I went Aikido. I said, “Yeah, that photo could have been a lot better. Is there more? Is there more you want to say about it?”

You’re a redhead. Does that mean you have more passion and you get triggered faster?

I don’t get triggered faster, no. I don’t know if I have more passion but when I’m into something, I’m pretty passionate.

Because I always imagined redheads to be like stormy.

Fiery? Yeah.

I’m not a redhead but I’m like that and I do get triggered fast. What I say to myself is, “Peace.” That’s my word.

Right. I’m fairly stable emotionally but I think part of it is that I probably learned to suppress a lot as a kid and I just learned not to feel. Sometimes, I can be angry and it’s not really that clear to me, I’m just a little bit pissed. It’s hard for me to express anger and be fiery.

I think it’s also cultural because I come from a society where we’re quick with our hands, “Everything is out there and this is how we solve conflicts. You talk about this and you solve the conflict…”

Where are you from?

Israel.

Oh, okay.

We solve the conflict and then it’s okay. But I found here in the US, a lot of people hold their emotions, especially when I just came here. People were really nice to me and I actually believed them. People say, “No, this is great. This is wonderful.” And I actually believe them, I didn’t see beyond. It’s like, I need to learn that interesting is a code for, “This art piece is so boring,” where people say, “This is interesting.” Or interesting can mean many things and when I hear, “Oh, it’s interesting.” “Mm-mm.” For me, I had to find the balance and now I’m totally, in my personality, half-American and half-Israeli, and I get to enjoy the best of both worlds.

You took it at face value at first, thinking people mean what they say and now you’re realizing sometimes it needs a little translation. You’re just saying about people not saying exactly what they mean, and I think that’s true. One of the things that I’m passionate about is changing and shifting that.

For example, if you’re at a party and someone’s telling you a story and you don’t want to hear it, they’ve been going on for five minutes and you’re just not interested. What if you could say something other than interesting? What if you could maybe redirect it and say, “Hey, I noticed I’m not feeling as engaged in this as when you were talking about the other thing, can I ask you about that?” Anything that involves more truth is something that gets me excited.

It’s definitely okay not to be okay. There are days where you just aren’t 100% and you should be fine with that.

You talked about vulnerability and risking being vulnerable, if somebody’s listening and vulnerable sounds like a bad word, vulnerable sounds like weakness, vulnerable sounds like, “People will not appreciate me, they will think I’m needy,” and all the stories we have around is very loaded word ‘vulnerable.’ How do you define vulnerability and why do you recommend risking being vulnerable?

This is how I define it at this moment; it just came to me. Vulnerability is exposing yourself to risk. By definition, if you’re vulnerable, you are risking yourself. When a dog rolls over on its back, it’s exposing its underbelly, and sometimes, its throat, and it’s saying, “You could hurt me, I understand that, and I’m rolling over anyway.”

When I was a kid, I’m sure there were times when I was vulnerable and I felt I got teased, I got picked on, or I said something in class and I got shut down. Then I decided, “All right, I’m not going to do that again. I’m not going to risk that. I’m not going to tell people things that might appear weak, because particularly in the Australian culture, they’re going to laugh at me and tell me to man up.”

I think that’s valid because these are ways that we learn to protect ourselves until we have the skill and maturity to realize the benefits of being vulnerable. If I’m never vulnerable with you, then I can’t ever fully feel love from you. I’m going to feel like you’re loving the mask that I’m presenting.

Yesterday, for example, I’m in a car with my two co-leaders after we’re just done this two-day training for prison staff on Authentic Relating. I shared with them the depth of my fatigue I was feeling and how I wasn’t even sure how to handle the car ride. I just wanted to close my eyes, listen to an audiobook, and try and survive the trip back because my head hurt so much. It felt really risky and vulnerable to share the depth of that because, to me, it’s weakness and they might think, “Oh, I won’t have that guy come and teach next time.”

They were amazing. They just really got my world, they asked questions, and they showed much compassion. I shared more with them than I think I’ve shared with anybody about my struggle with fatigue and I felt so close to them. I just wrote to them today and I said, “Hey, family,” because they feel like family to me. That could never have happened if I hadn’t taken a risk and really shown who I was.

That’s really beautiful and it’s true. I think I love my husband so much more because he sees me when I’m glamorous and when I’m not glamorous. He sees me when I’m angry and when I’m loving. I’m very open with him, plus it’s hard for me to hide my feelings.

You’re an open book. You don’t have to tell me what the secrets are but would you say you have zero secrets from your husband? There’s nothing about your life or your past that your husband knows or would you say that you choose maybe one or two things that remain private?

I've lived enough in a world where the truth wasn't told. I would rather be offended by an honest viewpoint someone has so that I can know them better, and maybe learn from it. Click To Tweet

I think he knows mostly everything.

I think that’s pretty rare. When I first got married, I had something that I’ve been holding that I told almost nobody, I was so ashamed of it, and I thought, “I don’t want her to marry me not knowing this,” because then I can always wonder if she knew this, maybe she would regret marrying me. It just made sense to me logically I have to tell her. I told her and she was just super loving, she’s like, “Oh, I can totally understand that. I love you,” she might have even respected me more for sharing it. I’m glad I did.

I’m not saying that everybody listening to this should go and share all their secrets with their partner. I’m not saying that but there’s something wonderful about knowing that there is nothing, absolutely nothing withheld that could ever bite you. If they found it out from someone else or you were talking in your sleep, they found out about something, there’s nothing they could get upset by because everything’s known, that’s a really wonderful place to be.

Most people have some secrets or some things that they have shame around, I’m suggesting if you move in that direction with some artistry, and perhaps some care, you can get to that point where these things are revealed, and you’re still accepted and loved, then you’ve got real love, and you know it rather than always subconsciously knowing, “They love what they see, I don’t know if they’d love all of it.”

I love it. I love what you just said. It’s not easy being in the space of truth, but I’d rather share my truth and deal with the uncomfortable situation and get it out of the way because when things accumulate that are in the way, it just blocks the relationship. Sometimes, you have to maybe sugarcoat the truth a little bit not to hurt the other person, but I like to live my life based on truth to the best of my ability.

Sugarcoating is a really interesting thing. We talked about white lies, we’re going to spare the person’s feelings, I don’t like that. I’ve lived enough in a world where the truth wasn’t told. I would rather be offended—this is my point of view—by a viewpoint, someone has so that I can know them more, I can deal with my own feelings, and then maybe learn from it.

I just feel lately, I’m such a straight shooter with people and I stopped caring about what they think about me. What you think about me is not my business, I cannot change the way you think about me, I cannot make you love me or like me. You don’t even know who I am. What you know is that part of me that you see. I’m not going to spend the rest of my life just to find out who I am for you to feel good about yourself.

Yeah, that’s powerful you just said, “What you think about me is not my business. I’ve got so much to do just handling what I think about me, it just doesn’t make any sense for me to take on what you think about me.” Byron Katie is one of my favorite teachers.

Being vulnerable is in reality, an act of bravery.

I love her.

Someone said to her, “Hey, careful of that person. You shouldn’t be friends with her. She just wants to be friends with you because of your money.” Katie said, “How wonderful for her.” She said, “That’s her business. It’s my business who I’m friends with and why. It’s not my business why she wants to be friends with me, but she does want to be friends with me and I like her.” I just thought that was incredible.

Byron Katie was on my husband’s show, Get Yourself Optimized.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, and John Gray, you said, was the one that you work with, John and Jack Canfield.

John is a friend and Jack Canfield, yeah.

John was on the show on Stellar Life too.

Oh, sweet. Katie’s going to appear on my show when it launches in a couple of weeks.

She’s amazing.

Oh, I love her. I spent a month with her at Turnaround House.

Oh, my God. Wow.

She says, “If I had one prayer, it would be this. God spare me the need for appreciation and approval.” It sounds like you’ve taken that hard. To be honest, I still care what people think. I do want them to like me.

Oh, no, I am work-ing- progress. I want to be liked and loved. I want everybody to think that I’m the best thing since peanut butter and jelly. I’m so smart, I’m so cute, and I’m so lovable.

Oh, I love hearing that. But you know that and having you tell me that, now I trust you more, because I get that about you. I can shower like, love, and praise on you knowing that you want that. It’s conscious.

There's sense in playing safe, but there's so much value in fully exploring and living your life. Click To Tweet

Tell me more.

You’re gorgeous. You said, “I’m not ready for video,” and then five minutes later, you appear and it’s like you’ve had an hour, you’re amazing, but I love that you know that. Most of us have got this subconsciously running that we want approval and the like, and it’s evolutionary. If you didn’t have this in caveman and cavewoman days, you would die because the tribe would kick you out. I think it’s natural but it’s covert, it’s subconscious, and we’re constantly trying to get it. If you can notice that, then you can say like you just did, “Yeah, I want to be liked when you think I’m cute, adorable, smart, and funny.” I want all that and I’m going to try and make it overt so it’s above the table rather than some subconscious manipulation.

Yes. Thank you. Let’s talk about the time where I looked at your website and it made me cry. I actually looked at the video you did with women prisoners and I cried. I had to take the time to relax-cry type of crying. It was just so beautiful, the fact that not too many people go to prisons and work with prisoners. It’s taboo. It’s something that is really outside of most people’s comfort zones. Just to see the little clip—I know there is an episode that I would love to see—on your website and see these women. They’re not prisoners, they’re just women and they’re so beautiful. They made a terrible mistake and they’re going to pay for that mistake for the next 20-some years or whatever. Some of them are young and some of them left their family behind. I’m getting chills just talking about it.

I’m curious. I know there’s a clip that’s 2 1/2 minutes, did you watch that one or did you watch the longer one that’s 29 minutes?

No, just the two and a half minutes. That was enough to make me cry.

Wow, because you’re speaking like you really know their stories, because the 29 minutes, you really get to know them.

I took everything to heart. It was almost like I was in the room. Do you know what else made me cry? It connected me to my mission with what I want to do with women, what I do, but if what I want to do on a bigger scale, and just seeing that transformation, oh, my God, I’m like choking right now, beautiful.

Oh, and what is it that you want to do with women on the bigger scale?

What I do with women, it’s quite similar to what you do, maybe less strategic and more right brain. It’s just helping them find more self-love, self-forgiveness, healing, confidence, connection to their femininity and sensuality, unapologetically, and just daring to dream, living their best life ever, attracting their dreams, and taking action courageously.

These women in prison can definitely use some healing, some self-forgiveness, and you hear McKenzie. I really got to know a couple of them because, for two days, we filmed the workshop and then we took two inmates aside and we filmed, interviewed them, and got their stories which would really make you cry.

No more, I can’t handle it.

Oh, you can’t handle it. We shouldn’t go there?

I’m joking.

McKenzie is 25-years old. Two years ago, she planned a robbery, she helped plan a robbery.

I remember her.

For the listeners, she wasn’t there for the robbery, she didn’t execute it, but she helped plan it and she exchanged a couple of phone numbers and connected a couple of people. They didn’t follow the plan, they went and did something else, someone got shot and killed so she got convicted of felony murder. She’s in prison for 25 years. She’s such a sweetheart and as she says, she can’t even begin to forgive herself because she’s starting to own the part that she played.

As I see these women needing self-forgiveness, compassion, and love, I realized that all of us have a form of that, all of us have done things that we carry guilt around or wish we could change. All of us have things that we feel shame around, “I’m too fat, I’m too old, I’m too ugly, I’m not smart enough, I’m not productive enough, I don’t make enough money,” whatever, we all have this. For me, it all comes back to, can we notice that and see the places where we’re not loving ourselves, hold ourselves there, and step-by-step, find our own innocence which is the path to self-love?

Tough conversations are the defining moments that literally shape our relationships, our careers, and our lives. Click To Tweet

I love that. One of my mentors, Dr. John Demartini, said, “Whatever you did or did not do, you’re worthy of love.” That’s a powerful sentence that I take with me. We’re so hard on ourselves, we carry so much guilt, we lock ourselves in a cage, and we wonder if somebody has the key, but we do, because we built that cage. It’s time to set ourselves free. That’s amazing what you did with those ladies.

One of my grandest dreams is, I saw your workshops and they look pretty insanely awesome. You work with a lot of people from the stage and then you help them breakthrough in their lives, I’m like, “Hell yeah.” The last time I did public speaking, it was in front of 500 people, it was the first time I was speaking in front of many people, and it just felt like, “I’m home.”

Oh, yeah? That’s great. I thought you’re going to say you felt terrified.

Oh, no. I felt awesome. Fear and excitement can feel the same way. You can have the same reaction with the excitement in your body and there may be shortness of breath or sweaty palms, but for me it was excitement. I just felt like there was a line of energy between me and the audience, we are connected, they’re getting it, I’m getting them, and it was like, “Hallelujah.”

You found your calling.

What’s your experience when you teach?

I’m sometimes terrified, particularly the time I walked up in front of 1200 people after not speaking for six years was just terrifying. In fact, the most scared I’ve ever been is when I went on national television in Australia live. I was wearing a kilt, playing guitar, and singing. It’s like The Gong Show. I was just like, “Am I going to remember the words, the chords? Am I going to make a mistake in public, in front of millions of Australians?” I was so terrified I started to pee my pants.

Oh, my God.

I know this is a lot of information but this is what happened, just a few drops came out, and I got doubly terrified because now I’m picturing myself—I’m wearing a kilt too—peeing my pants on national television, that’s not a look I want to have. Fortunately, I was traveling, I’d flown to Melbourne, Australia to do this show, be on TV, and I had my overnight bag in the green room so I put on two extra pairs of underpants just in case and then I walked down on stage. A lot of people see me speak and they have no idea that I’m terrified, it just doesn’t show on my face.

That doesn’t show at all, you look like a megastar.

Thank you. What happens pretty much when I get up there, I found a way to connect with myself and to be present with the audience. I think I have a natural way of speaking into their listening, because I don’t want to just speak at them. I want to offer something that’s going to make a difference. I check sometimes, “Do you want to talk about this? Because if you don’t, we can go to the pub and have a beer.”

I’m not attached as much anymore even though I do want them to like me and think I’m great. I don’t think I need it anymore. That’s had me terrified until I get up there. Once I’m there, once I breathe, once I see some people smiling and I’m speaking about something I really care about, I’m good. You’re right, I think I have that sense like, “I’m home, I love this.” It didn’t happen the first few times I spoke and that’s why I quit for six years because I just felt terrified and like a fraud onstage.

God, imposter syndrome.

And also I was young, I was like 27 and trying to teach people about living a great life, that was awkward. But then something had shifted in me and I went and spoke in front of 1200 people and a guy said to me at the end, “You seem Buddha-like on stage,” and I’m like, “What? I’m just Australian.”

I think what was going on is that I was comfortable with myself and I even laughed at myself when I made a mistake and I shared it with the audience and I told him how I screwed up. I actually started having a lot of fun. So, still, adrenaline pumping through my body, it was 1200 people and all these cameras, but I started having a lot of fun out there. I still get scared, though.

I get scared, too. I wouldn’t tell you that I wasn’t scared, but for me, the scare would just become like this rush of adrenaline and excitement. We don’t have much time, I have a question for you and then we’re going to let the listeners know how they can reach you and watch that clip that is just so beautifully inspiring. What are your three top tips to living a Stellar Life?

Add more truth to your life, especially when it’s difficult because there’s gold there in the areas that feel awkward and difficult. In fact, I just realized that is the path to self-love.

The second one, unless you’re already a crazy adventurer and you’re already jumping out of planes and just risking every area of your life, unless you’re that, a lot of people could use more daring. Take a little bit of a risk. I know there’s value in playing safe, but there’s so much value in fully exploring and living your life, and you won’t know until you do it. I don’t want you on your deathbed saying, “I wish I’d been more honest. I wish I’d gone for it more in my business. I wish I’d just told that person what I really thought,” I want you on your deathbed, when that time comes, saying, “I gave it everything, I didn’t hold back.”

The third one is to deepen connections. We can get distracted by shiny things, commercial things, buying, I love buying stuff, distracted by business success and making money, but at the end of the day, again, I believe we’re on our deathbed, what we’re going to judge ourselves on the depth of our connections. Did I express my love for people? Did I deepen my love for people? Did I care for people? I know this is true because just look at all the movies we love and value, we see those values in those movies, but in our lives, we sometimes get distracted.

By the way, the first two tips are going to help you with the third one of deeper connections. If you increase your level of truth and increase your level of daring in the relationship, then the outcome is…

Deepening your connection.

Deeper connection, or you may lose that connection but that might be the right thing to happen. If you’re honest and that person leaves, okay, that’s good information. More truth, more daring, and more connection.

Yes. How can people connect with you, find you, take your workshops, etc?

The main thing I’m focusing on now is simply one-on-one coaching for the right people. My website is playforreal.life. If you want the prison video, just click on prison up the top. I only work with 15 people at any given time, and the way I find the right people to work with is I offer a Discovery Session for free if you qualify. If something resonated here on this call and you’re thinking you’d love to create a plan for your life and business, then request a Discovery Session, and if at the end of that call you want to go off and implement that plan on your own, great. I’m not attached to us working together, it may not be appropriate. I hope you’ll let me know how it goes. But if we both feel that coaching could have a really big impact on your life and business, then we can talk about coaching then. There’s a big button right up the top of the site that says Request Discovery Session, you can’t miss it and it’s playforreal.life.

Thank you so much, David, and thank you listeners. Remember, add more truth into your life, adding more truth to your life is the path to self-love, dare more, deepen your connection, express your love, and have a Stellar Life. This is Orion. Until next time.

Your Checklist of Actions to Take

{✓} Spend time with yourself and get to know who you are on a deeper level. Explore what you love the most and understand your boundaries and limits.
{✓} Make peace with your past. Whatever trauma you’ve been through deserves healing, and you deserve to move on and be happy.
{✓} Don’t suppress negative feelings, but don’t dwell on them too long either. It’s okay not to be okay! What matters most is how you recover from the pain.
{✓} Vulnerability is not a weakness. Being open and honest about your fears, failures and insecurities with the right people at the right time can help you form deep connections.
{✓} Be wise when choosing your life partner. They will play a huge role in how you approach the challenges in your life and how you deal with your emotions.
{✓} Forgive yourself constantly. You’re only human and humans are bound to make mistakes. You deserve a second chance.
{✓} Don’t be afraid to take risks. Life begins outside of your comfort zone.
{✓} Express your love for the people you care about because you never know what life will throw at you next.
{✓} Deepen your connection with others. The most valuable gift you can offer is your time.
{✓} Check out David’s website playforreal.life for more inspirational content.

Links and Resources

About David Wood

“When you are 10,000 feet above the Himalayas hanging from a piece of cloth, you see life differently.”

He coaches high-performing entrepreneurs, executives and leaders to play the best game they possibly can. He’s coached thousands of hours in dozens of countries around the globe and is the author of Get Paid for Who You Are with a foreword, Jack Canfield. David built the world’s largest coaching business serving huge audiences worldwide teaching them about living a regret-free life.